第15章
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  TherewasastrangeanxietyinhermannerwhichdidnotescapeMrs。

  Harnham,andultimatelyresolveditselfintoafloodoftears。

  SinkingdownatEdith’sknees,shemadeconfessionthattheresultofherrelationswithherloveritwouldsoonbecomenecessarytodisclose。

  EdithHarnhamwasgenerousenoughtobeveryfarfrominclinedtocastAnnaadriftatthisconjuncture。Notruewomaneverissoinclinedfromherownpersonalpointofview,howeverpromptshemaybeintakingsuchstepstosafeguardthosedeartoher。AlthoughshehadwrittentoRayesoshortatimepreviously,sheinstantlypennedanotherAnna-notehintingclearlythoughdelicatelythestateofaffairs。

  Rayerepliedbyahastylinetosayhowmuchhewasaffectedbyhernews:hefeltthathemustrundowntoseeheralmostimmediately。

  Butaweeklaterthegirlcametohermistress’sroomwithanothernote,whichonbeingreadinformedherthatafterallhecouldnotfindtimeforthejourney。Annawasbrokenwithgrief;butbyMrs。

  Harnham’scounselstrictlyrefrainedfromhurlingathimthereproachesandbitternesscustomaryfromyoungwomensosituated。

  Onethingwasimperative:tokeeptheyoungman’sromanticinterestinheralive。RatherthereforedidEdith,inthenameofherprotegee,requesthimonnoaccounttobedistressedabouttheloomingevent,andnottoinconveniencehimselftohastendown。Shedesiredaboveeverythingtobenoweightuponhiminhiscareer,nocloguponhishighactivities。Shehadwishedhimtoknowwhathadbefallen:hewastodismissitagainfromhismind。Onlyhemustwritetenderlyasever,andwhenheshouldcomeagainonthespringcircuititwouldbesoonenoughtodiscusswhathadbetterbedone。

  ItmaywellbesupposedthatAnna’sownfeelingshadnotbeenquiteinaccordwiththesegenerousexpressions;butthemistress’sjudgmenthadruled,andAnnahadacquiesced。’AllIwantisthatNICENESSyoucansowellputintoyourletters,mydear,dearmistress,andthatIcan’tforthelifeo’memakeupoutofmyownhead;thoughImeanthesamethingandfeelitexactlywhenyou’vewrittenitdown!’

  Whentheletterhadbeensentoff,andEdithHarnhamwasleftalone,shebowedherselfonthebackofherchairandwept。

  ’Iwishitwasmine——Iwishitwas!’shemurmured。’YethowcanI

  saysuchawickedthing!’

  ThelettermovedRayeconsiderablywhenitreachedhim。Theintelligenceitselfhadaffectedhimlessthanherunexpectedmanneroftreatinghiminrelationtoit。Theabsenceofanywordofreproach,thedevotiontohisinterests,theself-sacrificeapparentineveryline,allmadeupanobilityofcharacterthathehadneverdreamtoffindinginwomankind。

  ’Godforgiveme!’hesaidtremulously。’Ihavebeenawickedwretch。

  Ididnotknowshewassuchatreasureasthis!’

  Hereassuredherinstantly;declaringthathewouldnotofcoursedeserther,thathewouldprovideahomeforhersomewhere。

  Meanwhileshewastostaywhereshewasaslongashermistresswouldallowher。

  Butamisfortunesupervenedinthisdirection。WhetheraninklingofAnna’scircumstancesreachedtheknowledgeofMrs。Harnham’shusbandornotcannotbesaid,butthegirlwascompelled,inspiteofEdith’sentreaties,toleavethehouse。ByherownchoiceshedecidedtogobackforawhiletothecottageonthePlain。Thisarrangementledtoaconsultationastohowthecorrespondenceshouldbecarriedon;andinthegirl’sinabilitytocontinuepersonallywhathadbeenbeguninhername,andinthedifficultyoftheiractinginconcertasheretofore,sherequestedMrs。Harnham——theonlywell-to-dofriendshehadintheworld——toreceivethelettersandreplytothemoff-hand,sendingthemonafterwardstoherselfonthePlain,whereshemightatleastgetsomeneighbourtoreadthemtoher,ifatrustworthyonecouldbemetwith。AnnaandherboxthendepartedforthePlain。

  ThusitbefelthatEdithHarnhamfoundherselfinthestrangepositionofhavingtocorrespond,undernosupervisionbytherealwoman,withamannotherhusband,intermswhichwerevirtuallythoseofawife,concerningaconditionthatwasnotEdith’satall;

  themanbeingoneforwhom,mainlythroughthesympathiesinvolvedinplayingthispart,shesecretlycherishedapredilection,subtleandimaginativetruly,butstrongandabsorbing。Sheopenedeachletter,readitasifintendedforherself,andrepliedfromthepromptingsofherownheartandnoother。

  Throughoutthiscorrespondence,carriedoninthegirl’sabsence,thehigh-strungEdithHarnhamlivedintheecstasyoffancy;thevicariousintimacyengenderedsuchaflowofpassionatenessaswasneverexceeded。Forconscience’sakeEdithatfirstsentoneachofhisletterstoAnna,andevenroughcopiesofherreplies;butlaterontheseso-calledcopiesweremuchabridged,andmanylettersonbothsideswerenotsentonatall。

  Thoughselfish,and,superficiallyatleast,infestedwiththeself-

  indulgentvicesofartificialsociety,therewasasubstratumofhonestyandfairnessinRaye’scharacter。Hehadreallyatenderregardforthecountrygirl,anditgrewmoretenderthaneverwhenhefoundherapparentlycapableofexpressingthedeepestsensibilitiesinthesimplestwords。Hemeditated,hewavered;andfinallyresolvedtoconsulthissister,amaidenladymucholderthanhimself,oflivelysympathiesandgoodintent。Inmakingthisconfidenceheshowedhersomeoftheletters。

  ’Sheseemsfairlyeducated,’MissRayeobserved。’Andbrightinideas。Sheexpressesherselfwithatastethatmustbeinnate。’

  ’Yes。Shewritesveryprettily,doesn’tshe,thankstotheseelementaryschools?’

  ’Oneisdrawnouttowardsher,inspiteofone’sself,poorthing。’

  Theupshotofthediscussionwasthatthoughhehadnotbeendirectlyadvisedtodoit,Rayewrote,inhisrealname,whathewouldneverhavedecidedtowriteonhisownresponsibility;namelythathecouldnotlivewithouther,andwouldcomedowninthespringandshelveherloomingdifficultybymarryingher。

  ThisboldacceptanceofthesituationwasmadeknowntoAnnabyMrs。

  HarnhamdrivingoutimmediatelytothecottageonthePlain。Annajumpedforjoylikealittlechild。Andpoor,crudedirectionsforansweringappropriatelyweregiventoEdithHarnham,whoonherreturntothecitycarriedthemoutwithwarmintensification。

  ’O!’shegroaned,asshethrewdownthepen。’Anna——poorgoodlittlefool——hasn’tintelligenceenoughtoappreciatehim!Howshouldshe?

  WhileI——don’tbearhischild!’

  ItwasnowFebruary。Thecorrespondencehadcontinuedaltogetherforfourmonths;andthenextletterfromRayecontainedincidentallyastatementofhispositionandprospects。Hesaidthatinofferingtowedherhehad,atfirst,contemplatedthestepofretiringfromaprofessionwhichhithertohadbroughthimveryslightemolument,andwhich,tospeakplainly,hehadthoughtmightbedifficultofpracticeafterhisunionwithher。Buttheunexpectedminesofbrightnessandwarmththatherlettershaddisclosedtobelurkinginhersweetnaturehadledhimtoabandonthatsomewhatsadprospect。

  Hefeltsurethat,withherpowersofdevelopment,afteralittleprivatetraininginthesocialformsofLondonunderhissupervision,andalittlehelpfromagovernessifnecessary,shewouldmakeasgoodaprofessionalman’swifeascouldbedesired,evenifheshouldrisetothewoolsack。ManyaLordChancellor’swifehadbeenlessintuitivelyaladythanshehadshownherselftobeinherlinestohim。

  ’O——poorfellow,poorfellow!’mournedEdithHarnham。

  Herdistressnowragedashighasherinfatuation。Itwasshewhohadwroughthimtothispitch——toamarriagewhichmeanthisruin;

  yetshecouldnot,inmercytohermaid,doanythingtohinderhisplan。AnnawascomingtoMelchesterthatweek,butshecouldhardlyshowthegirlthislastreplyfromtheyoungman;ittoldtoomuchofthesecondindividualitythathadusurpedtheplaceofthefirst。

  Annacame,andhermistresstookherintoherownroomforprivacy。

  Annabeganbysayingwithsomeanxietythatshewasgladtheweddingwassonear。

  ’OAnna!’repliedMrs。Harnham。’Ithinkwemusttellhimall——thatIhavebeendoingyourwritingforyou?——lestheshouldnotknowittillafteryoubecomehiswife,anditmightleadtodissensionandrecriminations——’

  ’Omis’ess,dearmis’ess——pleasedon’ttellhimnow!’criedAnnaindistress。’Ifyouweretodoit,perhapshewouldnotmarryme;andwhatshouldIdothen?Itwouldbeterriblewhatwouldcometome!

  AndIamgettingonwithmywriting,too。Ihavebroughtwithmethecopybookyouweresogoodastogiveme,andIpractiseeveryday,andthoughitisso,sohard,Ishalldoitwellatlast,Ibelieve,ifIkeepontrying。’

  Edithlookedatthecopybook。Thecopieshadbeensetbyherself,andsuchprogressasthegirlhadmadewasinthewayofgrotesquefacsimileofhermistress’shand。ButevenifEdith’sflowingcaligraphywerereproducedtheinspirationwouldbeanotherthing。

  ’Youdoitsobeautifully,’continuedAnna,’andsayallthatIwanttosaysomuchbetterthanIcouldsayit,thatIdohopeyouwon’tleavemeinthelurchjustnow!’

  ’Verywell,’repliedtheother。’ButI——butIthoughtIoughtnottogoon!’

  ’Why?’

  HerstrongdesiretoconfidehersentimentsledEdithtoanswertruly:

  ’Becauseofitseffectuponme。’

  ’ButitCAN’Thaveany!’

  ’Why,child?’

  ’Becauseyouaremarriedalready!’saidAnnawithlucidsimplicity。

  ’Ofcourseitcan’t,’saidhermistresshastily;yetglad,despiteherconscience,thattwoorthreeoutpouringsstillremainedtoher。

  ’ButyoumustconcentrateyourattentiononwritingyournameasI

  writeithere。’

  SoonRayewroteaboutthewedding。Havingdecidedtomakethebestofwhathefearedwasapieceofromanticfolly,hehadacquiredmorezestforthegrandexperiment。HewishedtheceremonytobeinLondon,forgreaterprivacy。EdithHarnhamwouldhavepreferreditatMelchester;Annawaspassive。Hisreasoningprevailed,andMrs。

  HarnhamthrewherselfwithmournfulzealintothepreparationsforAnna’sdeparture。Inalastdesperatefeelingthatshemustateveryhazardbeinatthedeathofherdream,andseeonceagainthemanwhobyaspeciesoftelepathyhadexercisedsuchaninfluenceonher,sheofferedtogoupwithAnnaandbewithherthroughtheceremony——

  ’toseetheendofher,’ashermistressputitwithforcedgaiety;

  anofferwhichthegirlgratefullyaccepted;forshehadnootherfriendcapableofplayingthepartofcompanionandwitness,inthepresenceofagentlemanlybridegroom,insuchawayasnottohastenanopinionthathehadmadeanirremediablesocialblunder。

  ItwasamuddymorninginMarchwhenRayealightedfromafour-wheelcabatthedoorofaregistry-officeintheS。W。districtofLondon,andcarefullyhandeddownAnnaandhercompanionMrs。Harnham。AnnalookedattractiveinthesomewhatfashionableclotheswhichMrs。

  Harnhamhadhelpedhertobuy,thoughnotquitesoattractiveas,aninnocentchild,shehadappearedinhercountrygownonthebackofthewoodenhorseatMelchesterFair。

  Mrs。Harnhamhadcomeupthismorningbyanearlytrain,andayoungman——afriendofRaye’s——havingmetthematthedoor,allfourenteredtheregistry-officetogether。TillanhourbeforethistimeRayehadneverknownthewine-merchant’swife,exceptatthatfirstcasualencounter,andintheflutteroftheperformancebeforethemhehadlittleopportunityformorethanabriefacquaintance。Thecontractofmarriageataregistryissoongotthrough;butsomehow,duringitsprogress,RayediscoveredastrangeandsecretgravitationbetweenhimselfandAnna’sfriend。

  Theformalitiesofthewedding——orratherratificationofapreviousunion——beingconcluded,thefourwentinonecabtoRaye’slodgings,newlytakeninanewsuburbinpreferencetoahouse,therentofwhichhecouldillaffordjustthen。HereAnnacutthelittlecakewhichRayehadboughtatapastrycook’sonhiswayhomefromLincoln’sInnthenightbefore。Butshedidnotdomuchbesides。

  Raye’sfriendwasobligedtodepartalmostimmediately,andwhenhehadlefttheonlyonesvirtuallypresentwereEdithandRayewhoexchangedideaswithmuchanimation。Theconversationwasindeedtheirsonly,Annabeingasadomesticanimalwhohumblyheardbutunderstoodnot。Rayeseemedstartledinawakeningtothisfact,andbegantofeeldissatisfiedwithherinadequacy。

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