第33章
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  MydearLouise,——Isendthisletterbyanexpressbeforehasteningtothechaletmyself。Takecourage。Yourlastletterseemedtomesofrantic,thatIthoughtmyselfjustified,underthecircumstances,inconfidingalltoLouis;itwasaquestionofsavingyoufromyourself。

  Ifthemeanswehaveemployedhavebeen,likeyours,repulsive,yettheresultissosatisfactorythatIamcertainyouwillapprove。I

  wentsofarastosetthepolicetowork,butthewholethingremainsasecretbetweentheprefect,ourselvesandyou。

  Inoneword,Gastonisajewel!Butherearethefacts。Hisbrother,LouisGaston,diedatCalcutta,whileintheserviceofamercantilecompany,whenhewasontheverypointofreturningtoFrance,arich,prosperous,marriedman,havingreceivedaverylargefortunewithhiswife,whowasthewidowofanEnglishmerchant。Fortenyearshehadworkedhardthathemightbeabletosendhomeenoughtosupporthisbrother,towhomhewasdevotedlyattached,andfromwhomhislettersgenerouslyconcealedallhistrialsanddisappointments。

  ThencamethefailureofthegreatHalmerhouse;thewidowwasruined,andthesuddenshockaffectedLouisGaston’sbrain。Hehadnomentalenergylefttoresistthediseasewhichattackedhim,andhediedinBengal,whitherhehadgonetotryandrealizetheremnantsofhiswife’sproperty。Thedear,goodfellowhaddepositedwithabankerafirstsumofthreehundredthousandfrancs,whichwastogotohisbrother,butthebankerwasinvolvedintheHalmercrash,andthustheirlastresourcefailedthem。

  Louis’widow,thehandsomewomanwhomyoutookforyourrival,arrivedinPariswithtwochildren——yournephews——andanemptypurse,hermother’sjewelshavingbarelysufficedtopayforbringingthemover。

  TheinstructionswhichLouisGastonhadgiventhebankerforsendingthemoneytohisbrotherenabledthewidowtofindyourhusband’sformerhome。AsGastonhaddisappearedwithoutleavinganyaddress,Mme。LouisGastonwasdirectedtod’Arthez,theonlypersonwhocouldgiveanyinformationabouthim。

  D’Arthezwasthemorereadytorelievetheyoungwoman’spressingneeds,becauseLouisGaston,atthetimeofhismarriagefouryearsbefore,hadwrittentomakeinquiriesabouthisbrotherfromthefamousauthor,whomheknewtobeoneofhisfriends。TheCaptainhadconsultedd’ArthezastothebestmeansofgettingthemoneysafelytransferredtoMarie,andd’Arthezhadreplied,tellinghimthatGastonwasnowarichmanthroughhismarriagewiththeBaronnedeMacumer。Thepersonalbeauty,whichwasthemother’srichheritagetohersons,hadsavedthemboth——oneinIndia,theotherinParis——fromdestitution。Atouchingstory,isitnot?

  D’Artheznaturallywrote,afteratime,totellyourhusbandoftheconditionofhissister-in-lawandherchildren,informinghim,atthesametime,ofthegenerousintentionsoftheIndianGastontowardshisParisbrother,whichanunhappychancehadfrustrated。Gaston,asyoumayimagine,hurriedofftoParis。Hereisthefirstrideaccountedfor。Duringthelastfiveyearshehadsavedfiftythousandfrancsoutoftheincomeyouforcedhimtoaccept,andthissumheinvestedinthepublicfundsunderthenamesofhistwonephews,securingthemeach,inthisway,anincomeoftwelvehundredfrancs。Nexthefurnishedhissister-in-law’srooms,andpromisedheraquarterlyallowanceofthreethousandfrancs。Hereyouseethemeaningofhisdramaticlaborsandthepleasurecausedhimbythesuccessofhisfirstplay。

  Mme。Gaston,therefore,isnorivalofyours,andhaseveryrighttoyourname。AmanofGaston’ssensitivedelicacywasboundtokeeptheaffairsecretfromyou,knowingashedid,yourgenerousnature。Nordoeshelookonwhatyougivehimashisown。D’Arthezreadmetheletterhehadfromyourhusband,askinghimtobeoneofthewitnessesathismarriage。Gastoninthisdeclaresthathishappinesswouldhavebeenperfectbutfortheonedrawbackofhispovertyandindebtednesstoyou。Avirginsoulisatthemercyofsuchscruples。Eithertheymakethemselvesfeltortheydonot;andwhentheydo,itiseasytoimaginetheconflictoffeelingandembarrassmenttowhichtheygiverise。NothingismorenaturalthanGaston’swishtoprovideinsecretasuitablemaintenanceforthewomanwhoishisbrother’swidow,andwhohadherselfsetasideonehundredthousandfrancsforhimfromherownfortune。Sheisahandsomewoman,warm-hearted,andextremelywell-bred,butnotclever。Sheisamother;and,youmaybesure,I

  lostmyhearttoheratfirstsightwhenIfoundherwithonechildinherarms,andtheotherdressedlikealittlelord。Thechildrenfirst!iswrittenineverydetailofherhouse。

  Farfrombeingangry,therefore,withyourbelovedhusband,youshouldfindinallthisfreshreasonforlovinghim。Ihavemethim,andthinkhimthemostdelightfulyoungfellowinParis。Yes!dearchild,whenIsawhim,Ihadnodifficultyinunderstandingthatawomanmightloseherheadabouthim;hissoulismirroredinhiscountenance。IfIwereyou,Ishouldsettlethewidowandherchildrenatthechalet,inaprettylittlecottagewhichyoucouldhavebuiltforthem,andadopttheboys!

  Beatpeace,then,dearsoul,andplanthislittlesurprise,inyourturn,forGaston。

  MME。GASTONTOTHECOMTESSEDEL’ESTORADE

  Ah!mydearfriend,whatcanIsayinanswerexceptthecruel/“Itistoolate“/ofthatfoolLafayettetohisroyalmaster?Oh!mylife,mysweetlife,whatphysicianwillgiveitbacktome。Myownhandhasdealtthedeathblow。Alas!haveInotbeenamerewill-o’-the-wisp,whosetwinklingsparkwasfatedtoperishbeforeitreachedaflame?

  Myeyesraintorrentsoftears——andyettheymustnotfallwhenIamwithhim。Iflytohim,andheseeksme。Mydespairisallwithin。

  ThistortureDanteforgottoplaceinhis/Inferno。/Cometoseemedie!

  Mylove,——TakethechildrenawaytoProvencewithoutme;IremainwithLouise,whohasonlyafewdaysyettolive。Icannotleaveeitherherorherhusband,forwhosereasonIfear。

  YouknowthescrapofletterwhichsentmeflyingtoVilled’Avray,pickingupthedoctorsonmyway。SincethenIhavenotleftmydarlingfriend,andithasbeenimpossibletowritetoyou,forIhavesatupeverynightforafortnight。

  WhenIarrived,IfoundherwithGaston,infulldress,beautiful,laughing,happy。Itwasaheroicfalsehood!Theywereliketwolovelychildrentogetherintheirrestoredconfidence。ForamomentIwasdeceived,likeGaston,bytheeffontery;butLouisepressedmyhand,whispering:

  “Hemustnotknow;Iamdying。“

  AnicychillfellovermeasIfeltherburninghandandsawtheredspotsonhercheeks。Icongratulatedmyselfonmyprudenceinleavingthedoctorsinthewoodtilltheyshouldbesentfor。

  “Leaveusforalittle,“shesaidtoGaston。“Twowomenwhohavenotmetforfiveyearshaveplentyofsecretstotalkover,andRenee,I

  havenodoubt,hasthingstoconfideinme。“

  Directlywewerealone,sheflungherselfintomyarms,unablelongertorestrainhertears。

  “Tellmeaboutit,“Isaid。“Ihavebroughtwithme,incaseofneed,thebestsurgeonandthebestphysicianfromthehospital,andBianchonaswell;therearefouraltogether。“

  “Ah!“shecried,“havetheminatonceiftheycansaveme,ifthereisstilltime。Thepassionwhichhurriedmetodeathnowcriesforlife!“

  “Butwhathaveyoudonetoyourself?“

  “Ihaveinafewdaysbroughtmyselftothelaststageofconsumption。“

  “Buthow?“

  “Igotmyselfintoaprofuseperspirationinthenight,andthenranoutandlaydownbythesideofthelakeinthedew。GastonthinksI

  haveacold,andIamdying!“

  “SendhimtoParis;Iwillfetchthedoctorsmyself,“Isaid,asI

  rushedoutwildlytothespotwhereIhadleftthem。

  Alas!mylove,aftertheconsultationwasover,notoneofthedoctorsgavemetheleasthope;theyallbelievethatLouisewilldiewiththefalloftheleaves。Thedearchild’sconstitutionhaswonderfullyhelpedthesuccessofherplan。Itseemsshehasapredispositiontothiscomplaint;andthough,intheordinarycourse,shemighthavelivedalongtime,afewdays’follyhasmadethecasedesperate。

  IcannottellyouwhatIfeltonhearingthissentence,basedonsuchclearexplanations。YouknowthatIhavelivedinLouiseasmuchasinmyownlife。Iwassimplycrushed,andcouldnotstirtoescorttothedoortheseharbingersofevil。Idon’tknowhowlongIremainedlostinbitterthoughts,thetearsrunningdownmycheeks,whenIwasrousedfrommystuporbythewords:

  “Sothereisnohopeforme!“inaclear,angelicvoice。

  ItwasLouise,withherhandonmyshoulder。Shemademegetup,andcarriedmeofftohersmalldrawing-room。Withabeseechingglance,shewenton:

  “Staywithmetotheend;Iwon’thavedolefulfacesroundme。Aboveall,Imustkeepthetruthfrom/him/。IknowthatIhavethestrengthtodoit。Iamfullofyouthandspirit,andcandiestanding!Formyself,Ihavenoregrets。IamdyingasIwishedtodie,stillyoungandbeautiful,intheperfectionofmywomanhood。

  “Asforhim,IcanseeverywellnowthatIshouldhavemadehislifemiserable。Passionhasmeinitsgrips,likeastrugglingfawn,impatientofthetoils。Mygroundlessjealousyhasalreadywoundedhimsorely。Whenthedaycamethatmysuspicionsmetonlyindifference——

  whichinthelongrunistherightfulmeedofalljealousy——well,thatwouldhavebeenmydeath。Ihavehadmyshareoflife。Therearepeoplewhosenamesonthemuster-rolloftheworldshowsixtyyearsofservice,andyetinallthattimetheyhavenothadtwoyearsofreallife,whilstmyrecordofthirtyisdoubledbytheintensityofmylove。

  “Thusforhim,aswellasforme,thecloseisahappyone。Butbetweenus,dearRenee,itisdifferent。Youlosealovingsister,andthatisalosswhichnothingcanrepair。Youaloneherehavetherighttomournmydeath。“

  Afteralongpause,duringwhichIcouldonlyseeherthroughamistoftears,shecontinued:

  “Themoralofmydeathisacruelone。Mydeardoctorinpetticoatswasright;marriagecannotrestuponpassionasitsfoundation,norevenuponlove。Howfineandnobleisyourlife!keepingalwaystotheonesaferoad,yougiveyourhusbandanever-growingaffection;whilethepassionateeagernesswithwhichIthrewmyselfintoweddedlifewasboundinnaturetodiminish。TwicehaveIgoneastray,andtwicehasDeathstretchedforthhisbonyhandtostrikemyhappiness。Thefirsttime,herobbedmeofthenoblestandmostdevotedofmen;nowitismyturn,thegrinningmonstertearsmefromthearmsofmypoethusband,withallhisbeautyandhisgrace。

  “YetIwouldnotcomplain。HaveInotknowninturntwomen,eachtheverypatternofnobility——oneinmind,theotherinoutwardform?InFelipe,thesouldominatedandtransformedthebody;inGaston,onecouldnotsaywhichwassupreme——heart,mind,orgraceofform。Idieadored——whatmorecouldIwishfor?Time,perhaps,inwhichtodrawneartheGodofwhomImayhavetoolittlethought。MyspiritwilltakeitsflighttowardsHim,fulloflove,andwiththeprayerthatsomeday,intheworldabove,Hewillunitemeoncemoretothetwowhomadeaheavenofmylifebelow。Withoutthem,paradisewouldbeadeserttome。

  “Toothers,myexamplewouldbefatal,forminewasnocommonlot。TomeetaFelipeoraGastonismorethanmortalscanexpect,andthereforethedoctrineofsocietyinregardtomarriageaccordswiththenaturallaw。Womanisweak,andinmarryingsheoughttomakeanentiresacrificeofherwilltothemanwho,inreturn,shouldlayhisselfishnessatherfeet。Thestirwhichwomenoflateyearshavecreatedbytheirwhiningandinsubordinationisridiculous,andonlyshowshowwellwedeservetheepithetofchildren,bestowedbyphilosophersonoursex。“

  Shecontinuedtalkingthusinthegentlevoiceyouknowsowell,utteringthegravesttruthsintheprettiestmanner,untilGastonentered,bringingwithhimhissister-in-law,thetwochildren,andtheEnglishnurse,whom,atLouise’srequest,hehadbeentofetchfromParis。

  “Herearetheprettyinstrumentsofmytorture,“shesaid,ashernephewsapproached。“Wasnotthemistakeexcusable?Whatawonderfullikenesstotheiruncle!“

  ShewasmostfriendlytoMme。Gastontheelderandbeggedthatshewouldlookuponthechaletasherhome;inshort,sheplayedthehostesstoherinherbestdeChaulieumanner,inwhichnoonecanrivalher。

  IwroteatoncetotheDucandDuchessedeChaulieu,theDucdeRhetore,andtheDucdeLenoncourt-Givry,aswellastoMadeleine。Itwastime。Nextday,Louise,wornoutwithsomuchexertion,wasunabletogoout;indeed,sheonlygotupfordinner。Inthecourseoftheevening,MadeleinedeLenoncourt,hertwobrothers,andhermotherarrived。ThecoolnesswhichLouise’ssecondmarriagehadcausedbetweenherselfandherfamilydisappeared。Everydaysincethatevening,Louise’sfatherandbothherbrothershaveriddenoverinthemorning,andthetwoduchessesspendalltheireveningsatthechalet。

  Deathunitesaswellasseparates;itsilencesallpaltryfeeling。

  Louiseisperfectioninhercharm,hergrace,hergoodsense,herwit,andhertenderness。Shehasretainedtothelastthatperfecttactforwhichshehasbeensofamous,andshelavishesonusthetreasuresofherbrilliantmind,whichmadeheroneofthequeensofParis。

  “Ishouldliketolookwelleveninmycoffin,“shesaidwithhermatchlesssmile,asshelaydownonthebedwhereshewastolingerforafortnight。

  Herroomhasnothingofthesick-chamberinit;medicines,ointments,thewholeapparatusofnursing,iscarefullyconcealed。

  “Isnotmydeathbedpretty!“shesaidtotheSevrespriestwhocametoconfessher。

  Wegloatedoverherlikemisers。Allthisanxiety,andtheterribletruthswhichdawnedonhim,havepreparedGastonfortheworst。Heisfullofcourage,buttheblowhasgonehome。Itwouldnotsurprisemetoseehimfollowhiswifeinthenaturalcourse。Yesterday,aswewerewalkingroundthelake,hesaidtome:

  “Imustbeafathertothosetwochildren,“andhepointedtohissister-in-law,whowastakingtheboysforawalk。“ButthoughIshalldonothingtohastenmyend,Iwantyourpromisethatyouwillbeasecondmothertothem,andwillpersuadeyourhusbandtoaccepttheofficeofguardian,whichIshalldeputetohiminconjunctionwithmysister-in-law。“

  Hesaidthisquitesimply,likeamanwhoknowsheisnotlongforthisworld。HehassmilesonhisfacetomeetLouise’s,anditisonlyIwhomhedoesnotdeceive。Heisamateforherincourage。

  Louisehasexpressedawishtoseehergodson,butIamnotsorryheshouldbeinProvence;shemightwanttorememberhimgenerously,andIshouldbeinagreatdifficulty。

  Good-bye,mylove。

  August25thherbirthday。

  YesterdayeveningLouisewasdeliriousforashorttime;butherdeliriumwastheprettiestbabbling,whichshowsthateventhemadnessofgiftedpeopleisnotthatoffoolsornobodies。InamerethreadofavoiceshesangsomeItalianairsfrom/IPuritani,LaSonnambula,Moise/,whilewestoodroundthebedinsilence。Notoneofus,noteventheDucdeRhetore,haddryeyes,soclearwasittousallthathersoulwasinthisfashionpassingfromus。Shecouldnolongerseeus!Yetshewastherestillinthecharmofthefaintmelody,withitssweetnessnotofthisearth。

  Duringthenightthedeathagonybegan。Itisnowseveninthemorning,andIhavejustmyselfraisedherfrombed。Someflickerofstrengthrevived;shewishedtositbyherwindow,andaskedforGaston’shand。Andthen,mylove,thesweetestspiritwhomweshalleverseeonthisearthdeparted,leavingustheemptyshell。

  Thelastsacramenthadbeenadministeredtheeveningbefore,unknowntoGaston,whowastakingasnatchofsleepduringthisagonizingceremony;andaftershewasmovedtothewindow,sheaskedmetoreadherthe/DeProfundis/inFrench,whileshewasthusfacetofacewiththelovelyscene,whichwasherhandiwork。Sherepeatedthewordsaftermetoherself,andpressedthehandsofherhusband,whokneltontheothersideofthechair。

  August26th。

  Myheartisbroken。Ihavejustseenherinherwinding-sheet;herfaceisquitepalenowwithpurpleshadows。Oh!Iwantmychildren!mychildren!Bringmemychildren!

  THEEND

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