第11章
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  feelforyourcharmbothofbodyandmind。Thereisinyouararecombinationoftheideal,thepractical,andthebewitchingwhichsatisfiesalikejudgment,ahusband’spride,desire,andhope,andwhichextendstheboundariesoflovebeyondthoseoflifeitself。

  Oh!mylovedone,maythegeniusofloveremainfaithfultome,andthefuturebefullofthosedelightsbymeansofwhichyouhaveglorifiedallthatsurroundsme!Ilongforthedaywhichshallmakeyouamother,thatImayseeyoucontentwiththefulnessofyourlife,mayhearyou,inthesweetvoiceIloveandwiththethoughts,blessthelovewhichhasrefreshedmysoulandgivennewvigortomypowers,thelovewhichismypride,andwhenceIhavedrawn,asfromamagicfountain,freshlife。Yes,I

  shallbeallthatyouwouldhaveme。Ishalltakealeadingpartinthepubliclifeofthedistrict,andonyoushallfalltheraysofaglorywhichwilloweitsexistencetothedesireofpleasingyou。“

  Somuchformypupil,dear!Doyousupposehecouldhavewrittenlikethisbefore?Ayearhencehisstylewillhavestillfurtherimproved。

  Louisisnowinhisfirsttransport;whatIlookforwardtoistheuniformandcontinuoussensationofcontentwhichoughttobethefruitofahappymarriage,whenamanandwoman,inperfecttrustandmutualknowledge,havesolvedtheproblemofgivingvarietytotheinfinite。Thisisthetasksetbeforeeverytruewife;theanswerbeginstodawnonme,andIshallnotresttillIhavemadeitmine。

  Youseethathefancieshimself——vanityofmen!——thechosenofmyheart,justasthoughtherewerenolegalbonds。Nevertheless,Ihavenotyetgotbeyondthatexternalattractionwhichgivesusstrengthtoputupwithagooddeal。YetLouisislovable;histemperiswonderfullyeven,andheperforms,asamatterofcourse,actsonwhichmostmenwouldplumethemselves。Inshort,ifIdonotlovehim,Ishallfindnodifficultyinbeinggoodtohim。

  Soherearemyblackhairandmyblackeyes——whoselashesact,accordingtoyou,likeVenetianblinds——mycommandingair,andmywholeperson,raisedtotherankofsovereignpower!Tenyearshence,dear,whyshouldwenotbothbelaughingandgayinyourParis,whenceIshallcarryyouoffnowandagaintomybeautifuloasisinProvence?

  Oh!Louise,don’tspoilthesplendidfuturewhichawaitsusboth!

  Don’tdothemadthingswithwhichyouthreatenme。Myhusbandisayoungman,prematurelyold;whydon’tyoumarrysomeyoung-heartedgraybeardintheChamberofPeers?Thereliesyourvocation。

  THEDUCDESORIATOTHEBARONDEMACUMER

  MADRID。

  MYDEARBROTHER,——YoudidnotmakemeDucdeSoriainorderthatmyactionsshouldbeliethename。HowcouldItoleratemyhappinessifI

  knewyoutobeawanderer,deprivedofthecomfortswhichwealtheverywherecommands?NeitherMarienorIwillconsenttomarrytillwehearthatyouhaveacceptedthemoneywhichUrracawillhandovertoyou。ThesetwomillionsarethefruitofyourownsavingsandMarie’s。

  Wehavebothprayed,kneelingbeforethesamealtar——andwithwhatearnestness,Godknows!——foryourhappiness。Mydearbrother,itcannotbethattheseprayerswillremainunanswered。Heavenwillsendyouthelovewhichyouseek,tobetheconsolationofyourexile。

  Mariereadyourletterwithtears,andisfullofadmirationforyou。

  Asforme,Iconsent,notformyownsake,butforthatofthefamily。

  TheKingjustifiedyourexpectations。Oh!thatImightavengeyoubylettinghimseehimself,dwarfedbeforethescornwithwhichyouflunghimhistoy,asyoumighttossatigeritsfood。

  TheonlythingIhavetakenformyself,dearbrother,ismyhappiness。

  IhavetakenMarie。ForthisIshallalwaysbebeholdentoyou,asthecreaturetotheCreator。TherewillbeinmylifeandinMarie’sonedaynotlessgloriousthanourweddingday——itwillbethedaywhenwehearthatyourhearthasfounditsmate,thatawomanlovesyouasyououghttobe,andwouldbe,loved。Donotforgetthatifyouliveforus,wealsoliveforyou。

  YoucanwritetouswithperfectconfidenceundercovertotheNuncio,sendingyourletters/via/Rome。TheFrenchambassadoratRomewill,nodoubt,undertaketoforwardthemtoMonsignoreBemboni,attheStateSecretary’soffice,whomourlegatewillhaveadvised。Nootherwaywouldbesafe。Farewell,dearexile,deardespoiledone。Beproudatleastofthehappinesswhichyouhavebroughttous,ifyoucannotbehappyinit。Godwilldoubtlesshearourprayers,whicharefullofyourname。

  LOUISEDECHAULIEUTOMME。DEL’ESTORADE

  March。

  Ah!mylove,marriageismakingaphilosopherofyou!Yourdarlingfacemust,indeed,havebeenjaundicedwhenyouwrotemethoseterribleviewsofhumanlifeandthedutyofwomen。Doyoufancyyouwillconvertmetomatrimonybyyourprogrammeofsubterraneanlabors?

  Alas!isthisthentheoutcomeforyouofourtoo-instructeddreams!

  WeleftBloisallinnocent,armedwiththepointedshaftsofmeditation,and,lo!theweaponsofthatpurelyidealexperiencehaveturnedagainstyourownbreast!IfIdidnotknowyouforthepurestandmostangelicofcreatedbeings,IdeclareIshouldsaythatyourcalculationssmackofvice。What,mydear,intheinterestofyourcountryhome,yousubmityourpleasurestoaperiodicthinning,asyoudoyourtimber。Oh!ratherletmeperishinalltheviolenceoftheheart’sstormsthanliveinthearidatmosphereofyourcautiousarithmetic!

  Asgirls,wewerebothunusuallyenlightened,becauseofthelargeamountofstudywegavetoourchosensubjects;but,mychild,philosophywithoutlove,ordisguisedunderashamlove,isthemosthideousofconjugalhypocrisies。Ishouldimaginethateventhebiggestoffoolsmightdetectnowandagaintheowlofwisdomsquattinginyourbowerofroses——aghastlyphantomsufficienttoputtoflightthemostpromisingofpassions。Youmakeyourownfate,insteadofwaiting,aplaythinginitshands。

  Weareeachdevelopinginstrangeways。Alargedoseofphilosophytoagrainofloveisyourrecipe;alargedoseoflovetoagrainofphilosophyismine。Why,Rousseau’sJulie,whomIthoughtsolearned,isamerebeginnertoyou。Woman’svirtue,quotha!Howyouhaveweigheduplife!Alas!Imakefunofyou,and,afterall,perhapsyouareright。

  Inonedayyouhavemadeaholocaustofyouryouthandbecomeamiserbeforeyourtime。YourLouiswillbehappy,Idaresay。Ifhelovesyou,ofwhichImakenodoubt,hewillneverfindout,that,forthesakeofyourfamily,youareactingasacourtesandoesformoney;andcertainlymenseemtofindhappinesswiththem,judgingbythefortunestheysquanderthus。Akeen-sightedhusbandmightnodoubtremaininlovewithyou,butwhatsortofgratitudecouldhefeelinthelongrunforawomanwhohadmadeofduplicityasortofmoralarmor,asindispensableasherstays?

  Love,dear,isinmyeyesthefirstprincipleofallthevirtues,conformedtothedivinelikeness。Likeallotherfirstprinciples,itisnotamatterofarithmetic;itistheInfiniteinus。Icannotbutthinkyouhavebeentryingtojustifyinyourowneyesthefrightfulpositionofagirl,marriedtoamanforwhomshefeelsnothingmorethanesteem。Youprateofduty,andmakeityourruleandmeasure;butsurelytotakenecessityasthespringofactionisthemoraltheoryofatheism?Tofollowtheimpulseofloveandfeelingisthesecretlawofeverywoman’sheart。Youareactingaman’spart,andyourLouiswillhavetoplaythewoman!

  Oh!mydear,yourletterhasplungedmeintoanendlesstrainofthought。Iseenowthattheconventcannevertaketheplaceofmothertoagirl。Ibegofyou,mygrandangelwiththeblackeyes,sopureandproud,soseriousandsopretty,donotturnawayfromthesecries,whichthefirstreadingofyourletterhastornfromme!Ihavetakencomfortinthethoughtthat,whileIwaslamenting,lovewasdoubtlessbusyknockingdownthescaffoldingofreason。

  ItmaybethatIshalldoworsethanyouwithoutanyreasoningorcalculations。Passionisanelementinlifeboundtohavealogicnotlesspitilessthanyours。

  Monday。

  YesterdaynightIplacedmyselfatthewindowasIwasgoingtobed,tolookatthesky,whichwaswonderfullyclear。Thestarswerelikesilvernails,holdingupaveilofblue。InthesilenceofthenightI

  couldhearsomeonebreathing,andbythehalf-lightofthestarsI

  sawmySpaniard,perchedlikeasquirrelonthebranchesofoneofthetreesliningtheboulevard,anddoubtlesslostinadmirationofmywindows。

  Thefirsteffectofthisdiscoverywastomakemewithdrawintotheroom,myfeetandhandsquitelimpandnerveless;but,beneaththefear,Iwasconsciousofadeliciousundercurrentofjoy。Iwasoverpoweredbuthappy。NotoneofthosecleverFrenchmen,whoaspiretomarryme,hashadthebrilliantideaofspendingthenightinanelm-treeattheriskofbeingcarriedoffbythewatch。MySpaniardhas,nodoubt,beenthereforsometime。Ah!hewon’tgivemeanymorelessons,hewantstoreceivethem——well,heshallhaveone。IfonlyheknewwhatIsaidtomyselfabouthissuperficialugliness!Otherscanphilosophizebesidesyou,Renee!Itwashorrid,Iargued,tofallinlovewithahandsomeman。Isitnotpracticallyavowingthatthesensescountforthreepartsoutoffourinapassionwhichoughttobesuper-sensual?

  Havinggotovermyfirstalarm,Icranedmyneckbehindthewindowinordertoseehimagain——andwellwasIrewarded!Bymeansofahollowcaneheblewmeinthroughthewindowaletter,cunninglyrolledroundaleadenpellet。

  GoodHeavens!willhesupposeIleftthewindowopenonpurpose?

  Butwhatwastobedone?Toshutitsuddenlywouldbetomakeoneselfanaccomplice。

  Ididbetter。IreturnedtomywindowasthoughIhadseennothingandheardnothingoftheletter,thenIsaidaloud:

  “Comeandlookatthestars,Griffith。“

  Griffithwassleepingasonlyoldmaidscan。ButtheMoor,hearingme,sliddown,andvanishedwithghostlyrapidity。

  Hemusthavebeendyingoffright,andsowasI,forIdidnothearhimgoaway;apparentlyheremainedatthefootoftheelm。Afteragoodquarterofanhour,duringwhichIlostmyselfincontemplationoftheheavens,andbattledwiththewavesofcuriosity,Iclosedmywidowandsatdownonthebedtounfoldthedelicatebitofpaper,withthetendertouchofaworkeramongsttheancientmanuscriptsatNaples。Itfeltredhottomyfingers。“Whatahorriblepowerthismanhasoverme!“Isaidtomyself。

  AllatonceIheldoutthepapertothecandle——Iwouldburnitwithoutreadingaword。Thenathoughtstayedme,“Whatcanhehavetosaythathewritessosecretly?“Well,dear,I/did/burnit,reflectingthat,thoughanyothergirlintheworldwouldhavedevouredtheletter,itwasnotfittingthatI——Armande-Louise-MariedeChaulieu——shouldreadit。

  Thenextday,attheItalianopera,hewasathispost。ButIfeelsurethat,ex-primeministerofaconstitutionalgovernmentthoughheis,hecouldnotdiscovertheslightestagitationofmindinanymovementofmine。Imighthaveseennothingandreceivednothingtheeveningbefore。Thiswasmostsatisfactorytome,buthelookedverysad。Poorman!inSpainitissonaturalforlovetocomeinatthewindow!

  Duringtheinterval,itseems,hecameandwalkedinthepassages。

  ThisIlearnedfromthechiefsecretaryoftheSpanishembassy,whoalsotoldthestoryofanobleactionofhis。

  AsDucdeSoriahewastomarryoneoftherichestheiressesinSpain,theyoungprincessMarieHeredia,whosewealthwouldhavemitigatedthebitternessofexile。ButitseemsthatMarie,disappointingthewishesofthefathers,whohadbetrothedthemintheirearliestchildhood,lovedtheyoungersonofthehouseofSoria,towhommyFelipe,gaveherup。AllowinghimselftobedespoiledbytheKingofSpain。

  “Hewouldperformthispieceofheroismquitesimply,“Isaidtotheyoungman。

  “Youknowhimthen?“washisingenuousreply。

  Mymothersmiled。

  “Whatwillbecomeofhim,forheiscondemnedtodeath?“Iasked。

  “ThoughdeadtoSpain,hecanliveinSardinia。“

  “Ah!thenSpainisthecountryoftombsaswellascastles?“Isaid,tryingtocarryitoffasajoke。

  “ThereiseverythinginSpain,evenSpaniardsoftheoldschool,“mymotherreplied。

  “TheBarondeMacumerobtainedapassport,notwithoutdifficulty,fromtheKingofSardinia,“theyoungdiplomatistwenton。“HehasnowbecomeaSardiniansubject,andhepossessesamagnificentestateintheislandwithfullfeudalrights。HehasapalaceatSassari。IfFerdinandVII。weretodie,Macumerwouldprobablygoinfordiplomacy,andtheCourtofTurinwouldmakehimambassador。Thoughyoung,heis-

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