struckupthebarrelwithmystaff，sothattheshotpiercedthetester，andthenwithaspinandathwackI
broughtthegoodhollydownupontherascal’shead，inamannerwhichstretchedhimuponthefloor。
Meanwhiletheothertworobbershadtakenthealarm，andrushedatme，onewithapistolandonewithahanger；whichforcedmetobeverylively。Fearingthepistolmost，Iflungtheheavyvelvetcurtainofthebedacross，thathemightnotseewheretoaimatme，andthenstoopingveryquicklyIcaughtupthesenselessrobber，andsethimupforashieldandtarget；whereuponhewasshotimmediately，withouthavingthepainofknowingit；andahappythingitwasforhim。Nowtheothertwowereatmymercy，beingmenbelowtheaveragestrength；andnohanger，exceptinmostskilfulhands，aswellasfirmandstrongones，hasanychancetoapowerfulmanarmedwithastoutcudgel，andthoroughlypractisedinsingle-stick。
SoItookthesetworogues，andboundthemtogether；
andleavingthemunderchargeofthebutleraworthyandshrewdScotchman，Imyselfwentinsearchoftheconstables，whom，aftersomefewhours，Ifound；
neitherweretheysodrunkbutwhattheycouldtakeropedmentoprison。Inthemorning，thesetwomenwerebroughtbeforetheJusticesofthePeace：andnowmywonderfulluckappeared；forthemeritofhavingdefeated，andcaughtthem，wouldneverhaveraisedmeonestepintheState，orinpublicconsideration，iftheyhadonlybeencommonrobbers，orevennotoriousmurderers。Butwhenthesefellowswererecognised，bysomeoneinthecourt，asProtestantwitnessesoutofemployment，companionsandunderstrapperstoOates，andBedloe，andCarstairs，andhandinglovewithDangerfield，Turberville；andDugdale——inaword，theverymenagainstwhomHisMajestytheKingborethebitterestrancour，butwhomhehadhithertofailedtocatch——whenthiswaslaidbeforethepublicwithemphasisandadmiration，atleastadozenmencameup，whomIhadneverseenbefore，andprayedmetoaccepttheircongratulations，andtobesuretorememberthem；
forallwereofneglectedmerit，andrequirednomorethanapieceofluck。
Iansweredthemverymodestly，andeachaccordingtohisworth，asstatedbyhimself，whoofcoursecouldjudgethebest。Themagistratemadememanycompliments，tentimesmorethanIdeserved，andtookgoodcaretohavethemcopied，thatHisMajestymightseethem。Anderethecasewasthoroughlyheard，andthosepoorfellowswerecommitted，morethanascoreofgenerousmenhadofferedtolendmeahundredpounds，wherewithtobuyanewCourtsuit，whencalledbeforeHisMajesty。
Nowthismayseemverystrangetouswholiveinabetterandpurerage——orsayatleastthatwedoso——andyetwhoarewetocondemnourfathersforteachingusbettermanners，andattheirownexpense？
Withthesepointsanyvirtuousmanisboundtodealquitetenderly，makingallowanceforcorruption，andnotbeingtoosureofhimself。Andtotellthetruth，althoughIhadseensolittleoftheworldasyet，thatwhichastonishedmeinthematter，wasnotsomuchthattheypaidmecourt，asthattheyfoundoutsosoontheexpediencyofdoingit。
InthecourseofthatsameafternoonIwassentforbyHisMajesty。HehadsummonedfirstthegoodEarlBrandir，andreceivedthetalefromhim，notwithoutexaggeration，althoughmylordwasaScotchman。ButthechiefthingHisMajestycaredtoknowwasthat，beyondallpossibledoubt，theseweretheverypreciousfellowsfromperjuryturnedtorobbery。
Beingfullyassuredatlastofthis，HisMajestyhadrubbedhishands，andorderedthebootsofastricterpatternwhichhehimselfhadinventedtobebroughtatonce，thathemighthavetheminthebestpossibleorder。Andheoiledthemhimself，andexpressedhisfearthattherewasnomaninLondonquitecompetenttoworkthem。Neverthelesshewouldtryoneortwo，ratherthanwaitforhispleasure，tillthetorturercamefromEdinburgh。
Thenextthingbedidwastosendforme；andingreatalarmandflurryIputonmybestclothes，andhiredafashionablehairdresser，anddrankhalfagallonofale，becausebothmyhandswereshaking。ThenforthI
set，withmyhollystaff，wishingmyselfwelloutofit。Iwasshownatonce，andbeforeIdesiredit，intoHisMajesty’spresence，andthereIstoodmosthumbly，andmadethebestbowIcouldthinkof。
AsIcouldnotadvanceanyfarther——forIsawthattheQueenwaspresent，whichfrightenedmetenfold——HisMajesty，inthemostgraciousmanner，camedowntheroomtoencourageme。AndasIremainedwithmyheadbentdown，hetoldmetostandup，andlookathim。
’Ihaveseentheebefore，youngman，hesaid；’thyformisnotonetobeforgotten。Wherewasit？Thouartmostlikelytoknow。’
’MayitpleaseYourMostGraciousMajestytheKing，’I
answered，findingmyvoiceinamannerwhichsurprisedmyself；’itwasintheRoyalChapel。’
NowImeantnoharmwhateverbythis。Ioughttohavesaidthe’Ante-chapel，’butIcouldnotremembertheword，andfearedtokeeptheKinglookingatme。
’Iamwell-pleased，’saidHisMajesty，withasmilewhichalmostmadehisdarkandstubbornfacelookpleasant，’tofindthatourgreatestsubject，greatestImeaninthebodilyform，isalsoagoodCatholic。
Thouneedestnotsayotherwise。Thetimeshallbe，andthatrightsoon，whenmenshallbeproudoftheonetruefaith。’Herehestopped，havinggoneratherfar!
butthegleamofhisheavyeyeswassuchthatIdurstnotcontradict。
’ThisisthatgreatJohannReed，’saidHerMajesty，comingforward，becausetheKingwasinmeditation；
’forwhomIhavesomuchheard，fromthedear，dearLorna。Ah，sheisnotofthisblackcountree，sheisofthebreetItalie。’
Ihavetriedtowriteit，asshesaidit：butitwantsabetterscholartoexpresshermodeofspeech。
’Now，JohnRidd，’saidtheKing，recoveringfromhisthoughtsaboutthetrueChurch，andthinkingthathiswifewasnottotaketheleaduponme；’thouhastdonegreatservicetotherealm，andtoreligion。ItwasgoodtosaveEarlBrandir，aloyalandCatholicnobleman；butitwasgreatservicetocatchtwoofthevilestbloodhoundseverlaidonbyheretics。Andtomakethemshootoneanother：itwasrare；itwasrare，mylad。Nowaskusanythinginreason；thoucanstcarryanyhonours，onthyclub，likeHercules。Whatisthychiefambition，lad？’
’Well，’saidI，afterthinkingalittle，andmeaningtomakethemostofit，forsotheQueen’seyesconveyedtome；’mymotheralwaysusedtothinkthathavingbeenschooledatTiverton，withthirtymarksayeartopay，Iwasworthyofacoatofarms。Andthatiswhatshelongsfor。’
’Agoodlad!Averygoodlad，’saidtheKing，andhelookedattheQueen，asifalmostinjoke；’butwhatisthyconditioninlife？’
’Iamafreeholder，’Ianswered，inmyconfusion，’eversincethetimeofKingAlfred。ARiddwaswithhimintheisleofAthelney，andweholdourfarmbygiftfromhim；oratleastpeoplesayso。Wehavehadthreeverygoodharvestsrunning，andmightsupportacoatofarms；butformyselfIwantitnot。’
’Thoushalthaveacoat，mylad，’saidtheKing，smilingathisownhumour；’butitmustbealargeonetofitthee。Andmorethanthatshaltthouhave，JohnRidd，beingofsuchloyalbreed，andhavingdonesuchservice。’
AndwhileIwonderedwhathemeant，hecalledtosomeofthepeopleinwaitingatthefartherendoftheroom，andtheybroughthimalittlesword，suchasAnniewouldskeweraturkeywith。Thenhesignifiedtometokneel，whichIdidafterdustingtheboard，forthesakeofmybestbreeches，andthenhegavemealittletapverynicelyuponmyshoulder，beforeI
knewwhathewasupto；andsaid，’Arise，SirJohnRidd!’
Thisastonishedandamazedmetosuchextentoflossofmind，thatwhenIgotupIlookedabout，andthoughtwhattheSnoweswouldthinkofit。AndIsaidtotheKing，withoutformsofspeech，——
’Sir，Iamverymuchobliged。ButwhatbeItodowithit？’
Thecoatofarms，devisedformebytheRoyalheralds，wasofgreatsize，andrichcolours，andfullofbrightimaginings。Theydidmethehonourtoconsultmefirst，andtotakenonoticeofmyadvice。ForI
beggedthattheremightbeagood-sizedcowonit，soastostampourpatsofbutterbeforetheywenttomarket：alsoahorseontheotherside，andaflocksnowedupatthebottom。Butthegentlemenwouldnothearofthis；andtofindsomethingmoreappropriate，theyinquiredstrictlyintotheannalsofourfamily。
Itoldthem，ofcourse，allaboutKingAlfred；uponwhichtheysettledthatonequartershouldbe，threecakesonabar，withalionregardant，doneuponafieldofgold。AlsoItoldthemthatverylikelytherehadbeenaRiddinthebattlefought，notveryfarfromPlover’sBarrows，bytheEarlofDevonagainsttheDanes，whenHubbatheirchiefwaskilled，andthesacredstandardtaken。AssomeoftheDanesaresaidtobeburied，evenuponlandofours，andwecalltheirgravesifsuchtheybeeventothisday’barrows，’
theheraldsquiteagreedwithmethataRiddmighthavebeenthere，orthereabouts；andifhewasthere，hewasalmostcertaintohavedonehisbest，beinginsightofhearthandhome；anditwasplainthathemusthavehadgoodlegstobeatthesametimeboththereandinAthelney；andgoodlegsareanargumentforgoodarms；
andsupposingamanofthissorttohavedonehisutmostasthemanneroftheRiddsis，itwasnexttocertainthathehimselfmusthavecapturedthestandard。Moreover，thenameofourfarmwaspureproof；aploverbeingawildbird，justthesameasaravenis。Uponthischainofreasoning，andwithoutanyweakmisgivings，theychargedmygrowingescutcheonwithablackravenonagroundofred。AndthenextthingwhichImentionedpossessingabsolutecertainty，towit，thatapigwithtwoheadshadbeenbornuponourfarm，notmorethantwohundredyearsagonealthoughhediedwithinaweek，mythirdquarterwasmadeatonce，byatwo-headedboarwithnobletusks，sableuponsilver。Allthiswasveryfierceandfine；
andsoIpressedforapeacefulcornerinthelowerdexter，andobtainedawheat-sheafsetupright，golduponafieldofgreen。
HereIwasinclinedtopause，andadmiretheeffect；
forevenDeWhichehalsecouldnotshowabearingsomagnificent。Buttheheraldssaidthatitlookedameresign-board，withoutagoodmottounderit；andthemottomusthavemynameinit。Theyofferedmefirst，’Riddnonridendus’；butIsaid，’forGod’ssake，gentlemen，letmeforgetmyLatin。’Thentheyproposed，’Riddreadethriddles’：butIbeggedthemnottosetdownsuchalie；fornoRiddeverhadmade，ormadeout，suchathingasariddle，sinceExmooritselfbegan。Thirdly，theygaveme，’Riddneverberidden，’
andfearingtomakeanyfurtherobjections，Ilettheminscribeitinbronzeuponblue。TheheraldsthoughtthattheKingwouldpayforthisnobleachievement；butHisMajesty，althoughgraciouslypleasedwiththeiringenuity，declinedinthemostdecidedmannertopayafarthingtowardsit；andasIhadnownomoneyleft，theheraldsbecameasblueasazure，andasredasgules；untilHerMajestytheQueencameforwardverykindly，andsaidthatifHisMajestygavemeacoatofarms，Iwasnottopayforit；thereforesheherselfdidsoquitehandsomely，andfeltgoodwilltowardsmeinconsequence。
Nowbeinginahurry——sofaratleastasitisinmynaturetohurry——togettotheendofthisnarrative，isitlikelythatIwouldhavedwelledsolonguponmycoatofarms，butforsomegoodreason？AndthisgoodreasonisthatLornatookthegreatestprideinit，andthoughtoratanyratesaidthatitquitethrewintotheshade，andeclipsed，allherownancientglories。
Andhalfinfun，andhalfinearnest，shecalledme’SirJohn’socontinually，thatatlastIwasalmostangrywithher；untilhereyeswerebedewedwithtears；
andthenIwasangrywithmyself。
Beginningtobeshortofmoney，andgrowinganxiousaboutthefarm，longingalsotoshowmyselfandmynobleescutcheontomother，ItookadvantageofLadyLorna’sinterestwiththeQueen，toobtainmyacquittanceandfulldischargefromevennominalcustody。Ithadbeenintendedtokeepmeinwaiting，untilthereturnofLordJeffreys，fromthatawfulcircuitofshambles，throughwhichhisnameisstillusedbymotherstofrightentheirchildrenintobed。
AndrightgladwasI——forevenLondonshrankwithhorroratthenews——toescapeamansobloodthirsty，savage，andeventohisfriendsamongwhomIwasreckonedmalignant。
EarlBrandirwasgreatlypleasedwithme，notonlyforhavingsavedhislife，butforsavingthatwhichhevaluedmore，thewealthlaidbyforLordAlan。Andheintroducedmetomanygreatpeople，whoquitekindlyencouragedme，andpromisedtohelpmeineverywaywhentheyheardhowtheKinghadspoken。Asforthefurrier，hecouldneverhaveenoughofmysociety；andthisworthyman，prayingmycommendation，demandedofmeonethingonly——tospeakofhimasIfoundhim。AsIhadfoundhimmanyaSunday，furbishingupoldfursfornew，withaglazetoconcealthemoths’ravages，I
beggedhimtoreconsiderthepoint，andnottodemandsuchaccuracy。Hesaid，’Well，well；alltradeshadtricks，especiallythetrickofbusiness；andImusttakehim——ifIwerehistruefriend——accordingtohisowndescription。’ThisIwasgladenoughtodo；becauseitsavedsomuchtrouble，andIhadnomoneytospendwithhim。Butstillherequestedtheuseofmyname；
andIbeggedhimtodothebestwithit，asIneverhadkeptabanker。Andthe’JohnRiddcuffs，’andthe’SirJohnmantles，’andthe’Holly-staffcapes，’heputintohiswindow，asthewinterwascomingon，ayandsoldforeverybodywasburningwithgossipaboutme，musthavemadethisgoodman’sfortune；sincetheexcessofpriceovervalueisthetruetestofsuccessinlife。
Tocomeawayfromallthisstuff，whichgrievesamaninLondon——whenthebriskairoftheautumncleareditswaytoLudgateHill，andclever’prenticesranout，andsniffedatit，andfeduponithavinglittleelsetoeat；andwhenthehorsesfromthecountrywereagoodlysighttosee，withtheraspofwinterbristlesrisingthroughandamongthesoftsummer-coat；andwhenthenewstrawbegantocomein，goldenwiththeharvestgloss，andsmellingmostdivinelyatthosestrangelivery-stables，wherethenagsareputquitetailtotail；andwhenalltheLondonfolkthemselvesareaskingaboutwhitefrostfromrecollectionsofchildhood；then，Isay，suchayearningseizedmeformoorycrag，andfordewyblade，andeventhegruntingofoursheepwhenthesungoesdown，thatnothingbutthenewwispsofSamsoncouldhaveheldmeinLondontown。
Lornawasmovedwithequallongingtowardsthecountryandcountryways；andshespokequiteasmuchoftheglisteningdewasshedidofthesmellofouroven。