第53章
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  Andaftersometalk,webothagreedthatyouinparticularwantedsomeobjectintheSchoolbeyondgamesandmischief;foritwasquiteclearthatyouneverwouldmaketheregularschoolworkyourfirstobject。AndsotheDoctor,atthebeginningofthenexthalf-year,lookedoutthebestofthenewboys,andseparatedyouandEast,andputtheyoungboyintoyourstudy,inthehopethatwhenyouhadsomebodytoleanonyou,youwouldbegintostandalittlesteadieryourself,andgetmanlinessandthoughtfulness。AndIcanassureyouhehaswatchedtheexperimenteversincewithgreatsatisfaction。Ah!notoneofyouboyswilleverknowtheanxietyyouhavegivenhim,orthecarewithwhichhehaswatchedovereverystepinyourschoollives。“

  UptothistimeTomhadnevergivenwhollyintoorunderstoodtheDoctor。Atfirsthehadthoroughlyfearedhim。Forsomeyears,asIhavetriedtoshow,hehadlearnttoregardhimwithloveandrespect,andtothinkhimaverygreatandwiseandgoodman。ButasregardedhisownpositionintheSchool,ofwhichhewasnolittleproud,Tomhadnoideaofgivinganyonecreditforitbuthimself,and,truthtotell,wasaveryself-

  conceitedyounggentlemanonthesubject。HewaswonttoboastthathehadfoughthisownwayfairlyuptheSchool,andhadnevermadeuptoorbeentakenupbyanybigfellowormaster,andthatitwasnowquiteadifferentplacefromwhatitwaswhenhefirstcame。And,indeed,thoughhedidn’tactuallyboastofit,yetinhissecretsoulhedidtoagreatextentbelievethatthegreatreformintheSchoolhadbeenowingquiteasmuchtohimselfastoanyoneelse。Arthur,heacknowledged,haddonehimgood,andtaughthimagooddeal;sohadotherboysindifferentways,buttheyhadnothadthesamemeansofinfluenceontheSchoolingeneral。AndasfortheDoctor,why,hewasasplendidmaster;buteveryoneknewthatmasterscoulddoverylittleoutofschoolhours。Inshort,hefeltontermsofequalitywithhischief,sofarasthesocialstateoftheSchoolwasconcerned,andthoughtthattheDoctorwouldfinditnoeasymattertogetonwithouthim。Moreover,hisSchoolToryismwasstillstrong,andhelookedstillwithsomejealousyontheDoctor,assomewhatofafanaticinthematterofchange,andthoughtitverydesirablefortheSchoolthatheshouldhavesomewisepersonsuchashimselftolooksharplyaftervestedSchool-rights,andseethatnothingwasdonetotheinjuryoftherepublicwithoutdueprotest。

  Itwasanewlighttohimtofindthat,besidesteachingthesixth,andgoverningandguidingthewholeSchool,editingclassics,andwritinghistories,thegreatheadmasterhadfoundtimeinthosebusyyearstowatchoverthecareerevenofhim,TomBrown,andhisparticularfriends,and,nodoubt,offiftyotherboysatthesametime,andallthiswithouttakingtheleastcredittohimself,orseemingtoknow,orletanyoneelseknow,thatheeverthoughtparticularlyofanyboyatall。

  However,theDoctor’svictorywascompletefromthatmomentoverTomBrownatanyrate。Hegavewayatallpoints,andtheenemymarchedrightoverhim——cavalry,infantry,andartillery,andthelandtransportcorps,andthecampfollowers。Ithadtakeneightlongyearstodoit;butnowitwasdonethoroughly,andtherewasn’tacornerofhimleftwhichdidn’tbelieveintheDoctor。HadhereturnedtoSchoolagain,andtheDoctorbegunthehalf-yearbyabolishingfagging,andfootball,andtheSaturdayhalf-holiday,oralloranyofthemostcherishedSchoolinstitutions,Tomwouldhavesupportedhimwiththeblindestfaith。Andso,afterahalfconfessionofhispreviousshortcomings,andsorrowfuladieustohistutor,fromwhomhereceivedtwobeautifully-boundvolumesoftheDoctor’ssermons,asapartingpresent,hemarcheddowntotheSchoolhouse,ahero-worshipper,whowouldhavesatisfiedthesoulofThomasCarlylehimself。

  Therehefoundtheelevenathighjinksaftersupper,JackRagglesshoutingcomicsongsandperformingfeatsofstrength,andwasgreetedbyachorusofmingledremonstranceathisdesertionandjoyathisreappearance。Andfallinginwiththehumouroftheevening,hewassoonasgreataboyasalltherest;andatteno’clockwaschairedroundthequadrangle,ononeofthehallbenches,bornealoftbytheeleven,shoutinginchorus,“Forhe’sajollygoodfellow,“whileoldThomas,inameltingmood,andtheotherSchool-houseservants,stoodlookingon。

  Andthenextmorningafterbreakfasthesquaredupallthecricketingaccounts,wentroundtohistradesmenandotheracquaintance,andsaidhisheartygood-byes;andbytwelveo’clockwasinthetrain,andawayforLondon,nolongeraschool-boy,anddividedinhisthoughtsbetweenhero-worship,honestregretsoverthelongstageofhislifewhichwasnowslippingoutofsightbehindhim,andhopesandresolvesforthenextstageuponwhichhewasenteringwithalltheconfidenceofayoungtraveller。

  “Strangefriend,past,present,andtobe;

  Loveddeeplier,darklierunderstood;

  BeholdIdreamadreamofgood,Andminglealltheworldwiththee。“-TENNYSON。

  Inthesummerof1842,ourherostoppedonceagainatthewell-

  knownstation;andleavinghisbagandfishing-rodwithaporter,walkedslowlyandsadlyuptowardsthetown。ItwasnowJuly。HehadrushedawayfromOxfordthemomentthattermwasover,forafishingrambleinScotlandwithtwocollegefriends,andhadbeenforthreeweekslivingonoatcake,mutton-hams,andwhisky,inthewildestpartsofSkye。TheyhaddescendedonesultryeveningonthelittleinnatKyleRheaferry;andwhileTomandanotherofthepartyputtheirtackletogetherandbeganexploringthestreamforasea-troutforsupper,thethirdstrolledintothehousetoarrangefortheirentertainment。

  Presentlyhecameoutinalooseblouseandslippers,ashortpipeinhismouth,andanoldnewspaperinhishand,andthrewhimselfontheheatheryscrubwhichmettheshingle,withineasyhailofthefishermen。Therehelay,thepictureoffree-and-

  easy,loafing,hand-to-mouthyoungEngland,“improvinghismind,“asheshoutedtothem,bytheperusalofthefortnight-

  oldweeklypaper,soiledwiththemarksoftoddy-glassesandtobacco-ashes,thelegacyofthelasttraveller,whichhehadhuntedoutfromthekitchenofthelittlehostelry,and,beingayouthofacommunicativeturnofmind,beganimpartingthecontentstothefishermenashewenton。

  “Whatabothertheyaremakingaboutthesewretchedcorn-laws!

  Here’sthreeorfourcolumnsfullofnothingbutslidingscalesandfixedduties。Hangthistobacco,it’salwaysgoingout!

  Ah,here’ssomethingbetter——asplendidmatchbetweenKentandEngland,Brown,Kentwinningbythreewickets。Felixfifty-sixrunswithoutachance,andnotout!“

  Tom,intentonafishwhichhadrisenathimtwice,answeredonlywithagrunt。

  “AnythingabouttheGoodwood?“calledoutthethirdman。

  “RoryO’Moredrawn。Butterflycoltamiss,“shoutedthestudent。

  “Justmyluck,“grumbledtheinquirer,jerkinghisfliesoffthewater,andthrowingagainwithaheavy,sullensplash,andfrighteningTom’sfish。

  “Isay,can’tyouthrowlighteroverthere?Weain’tfishingforgrampuses,“shoutedTomacrossthestream。

  “Hullo,Brown!here’ssomethingforyou,“calledoutthereadingmannextmoment。“Why,youroldmaster,ArnoldofRugby,isdead。“

  Tom’shandstoppedhalf-wayinhiscast,andhislineandflieswentalltanglingroundandroundhisrod;youmighthaveknockedhimoverwithafeather。Neitherofhiscompanionstookanynoticeofhim,luckily;andwithaviolentefforthesettoworkmechanicallytodisentanglehisline。Hefeltcompletelycarriedoffhismoralandintellectuallegs,asifhehadlosthisstanding-pointintheinvisibleworld。Besideswhich,thedeep,lovingloyaltywhichhefeltforhisoldleadermadetheshockintenselypainful。Itwasthefirstgreatwrenchofhislife,thefirstgapwhichtheangelDeathhadmadeinhiscircle,andhefeltnumbed,andbeatendown,andspiritless。

  Well,well!Ibelieveitwasgoodforhimandformanyothersinlikecase,whohadtolearnbythatlossthatthesoulofmancannotstandorleanuponanyhumanprop,howeverstrong,andwise,andgood;butthatHeuponwhomaloneitcanstandandleanwillknockawayallsuchpropsinHisownwiseandmercifulway,untilthereisnogroundorstayleftbutHimself,theRockofAges,uponwhomaloneasurefoundationforeverysoulofmanislaid。

  Ashewearilylabouredathisline,thethoughtstruckhim,“Itmaybeallfalse——amerenewspaperlie。“Andhestrodeuptotherecumbentsmoker。

  “Letmelookatthepaper,“saidhe。

  “Nothingelseinit,“answeredtheother,handingituptohimlistlessly。“Hullo,Brown!what’sthematter,oldfellow?

  Ain’tyouwell?“

  “Whereisit?“saidTom,turningovertheleaves,hishandstrembling,andhiseyesswimming,sothathecouldnotread。

  “What?Whatareyoulookingfor?“saidhisfriend,jumpingupandlookingoverhisshoulder。

  “That——aboutArnold,“saidTom。

  “Oh,here,“saidtheother,puttinghisfingerontheparagraph。

  Tomreaditoverandoveragain。Therecouldbenomistakeofidentity,thoughtheaccountwasshortenough。

  “Thankyou,“saidheatlast,droppingthepaper。“Ishallgoforawalk。Don’tyouandHerbertwaitsupperforme。“Andawayhestrode,upoverthemooratthebackofthehouse,tobealone,andmasterhisgriefifpossible。

  Hisfriendlookedafterhim,sympathizingandwondering,and,knockingtheashesoutofhispipe,walkedovertoHerbert。

  Afterashortparleytheywalkedtogetheruptothehouse。

  “I’mafraidthatconfoundednewspaperhasspoiledBrown’sfunforthistrip。“

  “Howoddthatheshouldbesofondofhisoldmaster,“saidHerbert。Yettheyalsowerebothpublic-schoolmen。

  Thetwo,however,notwithstandingTom’sprohibition,waitedsupperforhim,andhadeverythingreadywhenhecamebacksomehalfanhourafterwards。Buthecouldnotjoinintheircheerfultalk,andthepartywassoonsilent,notwithstandingtheeffortsofallthree。OnethingonlyhadTomresolved,andthatwas,thathecouldn’tstayinScotlandanylonger:hefeltanirresistiblelongingtogettoRugby,andthenhome,andsoonbrokeittotheothers,whohadtoomuchtacttooppose。

  SobydaylightthenextmorninghewasmarchingthroughRoss-

  shire,andintheeveninghittheCaledonianCanal,tookthenextsteamer,andtravelledasfastasboatandrailwaycouldcarryhimtotheRugbystation。

  Ashewalkeduptothetown,hefeltshyandafraidofbeingseen,andtookthebackstreets——why,hedidn’tknow,buthefollowedhisinstinct。AttheSchool-gateshemadeadeadpause;therewasnotasoulinthequadrangle——allwaslonely,andsilent,andsad。Sowithanotherefforthestrodethroughthequadrangle,andintotheSchool-houseoffices。

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