treasuredBottlebegantocostme，nomanknows。Itwasmypreciouschargethroughalongtour，and，forhundredsofmiles，I

　　neverhaditoffmymindbydayorbynight。Overbadroads-andtheyweremany-Iclungtoitwithaffectionatedesperation。Upmountains，Ilookedinatitandsawithelplesslytiltingoveronitsback，withterror。Atinnumerableinndoorswhentheweatherwasbad，IwasobligedtobeputintomyvehiclebeforetheBottlecouldbegotin，andwasobligedtohavetheBottleliftedoutbeforehumanaidcouldcomenearme。TheImpofthesamename，exceptthathisassociationswereallevilandtheseassociationswereallgood，wouldhavebeenalesstroublesometravellingcompanion。ImighthaveservedMr。CruikshankasasubjectforanewillustrationofthemiseriesoftheBottle。TheNationalTemperanceSocietymighthavemadeapowerfulTractofme。

　　ThesuspicionsthatattachedtothisinnocentBottle，greatlyaggravatedmydifficulties。Itwasliketheapple-pieinthechild’sbook。Parmapoutedatit，Modenamockedit，Tuscanytackledit，Naplesnibbledit，Romerefusedit，Austriaaccusedit，Soldierssuspectedit，Jesuitsjobbedit。IcomposedaneatOration，developingmyinoffensiveintentionsinconnexionwiththisBottle，anddelivereditinaninfinityofguard-houses，atamultitudeoftowngates，andoneverydrawbridge，angle，andrampart，ofacompletesystemoffortifications。Fiftytimesaday，IgotdowntoharangueaninfuriatedsoldieryabouttheBottle。ThroughthefilthydegradationoftheabjectandvileRomanStates，IhadasmuchdifficultyinworkingmywaywiththeBottle，asifithadbottledupacompletesystemofhereticaltheology。IntheNeapolitancountry，whereeverybodywasaspy，asoldier，apriest，oralazzarone，theshamelessbeggarsofallfourdenominationsincessantlypouncedontheBottleandmadeitapretextforextortingmoneyfromme。Quires-quiresdoIsay？

　　Reams-offormsillegiblyprintedonwhity-brownpaperwerefilledupabouttheBottle，anditwasthesubjectofmorestampingandsandingthanIhadeverseenbefore。Inconsequenceofwhichhazeofsand，perhaps，itwasalwaysirregular，andalwayslatentwithdismalpenaltiesofgoingbackornotgoingforward，whichwereonlytobeabatedbythesilvercrossingofabasehand，pokedshirtlessoutofaraggeduniformsleeve。Underalldiscouragements，however，IstucktomyBottle，andheldfirmtomyresolutionthateverydropofitscontentsshouldreachtheBottle’sdestination。

　　Thelatterrefinementcostmeaseparateheapoftroublesonitsownseparateaccount。WhatcorkscrewsdidIseethemilitarypowerbringoutagainstthatBottle；whatgimlets，spikes，diviningrods，gauges，andunknowntestsandinstruments！Atsomeplaces，theypersistedindeclaringthatthewinemustnotbepassed，withoutbeingopenedandtasted；I，pleadingtothecontrary，usedthentoarguethequestionseatedontheBottlelesttheyshouldopenitinspiteofme。InthesouthernpartsofItalymoreviolentshrieking，face-making，andgesticulating，greatervehemenceofspeechandcountenanceandaction，wentonaboutthatBottlethanwouldattendfiftymurdersinanorthernlatitude。Itraisedimportantfunctionariesoutoftheirbeds，inthedeadofnight。I

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