第27章
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  IsawamancomechargingoutofPalaceYard——thepolicemantouchedhishelmettohim——withahatandabearingastonishinglylikemyuncle’s。Afterall,——didn’tCracknellhimselfsitintheHouse?

  Tono-BungayshoutedatmefromahoardingnearAdelphiTerrace;I

  sawitafaroffnearCarfaxStreet;itcriedoutagainuponmeinKensingtonHighStreet,andburstintoaperfectclamour;sixorseventimesIsawitasIdrewnearmydiggings。Itcertainlyhadanairofbeingsomethingmorethanadream。

  Yes,Ithoughtitover——thoroughlyenough。Traderulestheworld。Wealthratherthantrade!Thethingwastrue,andtruetoowasmyuncle’spropositionthatthequickestwaytogetwealthistosellthecheapestthingpossibleinthedearestbottle。Hewasfrightfullyrightafterall。Pecunnianonolet,——aRomanemperorsaidthat。PerhapsmygreatheroesinPlutarchwerenomorethansuchmen,finenowonlybecausetheyaredistant;perhapsafterallthisSocialismtowhichIhadbeendrawnwasonlyafoolishdream,onlythemorefoolishbecauseallitspromiseswereconditionallytrue。Morrisandtheseothersplayedwithitwittingly;itgaveazest,atouchofsubstance,totheiraestheticpleasures。Neverwouldtherebegoodfaithenoughtobringsuchthingsabout。Theyknewit;everyone,exceptafewyoungfools,knewit。AsIcrossedthecornerofSt。James’sParkwrappedinthought,Idodgedbackjustintimetoescapeaprancingpairofgreys。Astout,common-lookingwoman,verymagnificentlydressed,regardedmefromthecarriagewithascornfuleye。“Nodoubt。”thoughtI,“apill-vendor’swife。”

  Runningthroughallmythoughts,surgingoutlikearefrain,wasmyuncle’smaster-stroke,hisadmirabletouchofpraise:“Makeitallslick——andthenmakeitgoWoosh。Iknowyoucan!Oh!I

  KNOWyoucan!”

  Ewartasamoralinfluencewasunsatisfactory。Ihadmadeupmymindtoputthewholethingbeforehim,partlytoseehowhetookit,andpartlytohearhowitsoundedwhenitwassaid。IaskedhimtocomeandeatwithmeinanItalianplacenearPantonStreetwhereonecouldgetacurious,interesting,gluttingsortofdinnerforeighteen-pence。Hecamewithadisconcertingblack-eyethathewouldn’texplain。“Notsomuchablack-eye。”

  hesaid,“astheaftermathofapurplepatch。What’syourdifficulty?”

  “I’lltellyouwiththesalad。”Isaid。

  ButasamatteroffactIdidn’ttellhim。IthrewoutthatI

  wasdoubtfulwhetherIoughttogointotrade,orsticktoteachinginviewofmydeepeningsocialistproclivities;andhe,warmingwiththeunaccustomedgenerosityofasixteen-pennyChianti,ranonfromthatwithoutanyfurtherinquiryastomytrouble。

  Hisutterancesrovedwideandloose。

  “Therealityoflife,mydearPonderevo。”Irememberhimsayingveryimpressivelyandpunctuatingwiththenut-crackersashespoke,“isChromaticConflict。andForm。Getholdofthatandletalltheseotherquestionsgo。TheSocialistwilltellyouonesortofcolourandshapeisright,theIndividualistanother。

  Whatdoesitallamountto?WhatDOESitallamountto?

  NOTHING!Ihavenoadvicetogiveanyone,——excepttoavoidregrets。Beyourself,seekaftersuchbeautifulthingsasyourownsensedeterminestobebeautiful。Anddon’tmindtheheadacheinthemorning。Forwhat,afterall,isamorning,Ponderevo?Itisn’tliketheupperpartofaday!”

  Hepausedimpressively。

  “WhatRot!”Icried,afteraconfusedattempttoapprehendhim。

  “Isn’tit!Andit’smybedrockwisdominthematter!Takeitorleaveit,mydearGeorge;takeitorleaveit。”。Heputdownthenut-crackersoutofmyreachandluggedagreasy-lookingnote-bookfromhispocket。“I’mgoingtostealthismustardpot。”hesaid。

  Imadenoisesofremonstrance。

  “Onlyasamatterofdesign。I’vegottodoanoldbeast’stomb。

  Wholesalegrocer。I’llputitonhiscorners,——fourmustardpots。Idaresayhe’dbegladofamustardplasternowtocoolhim,poordevil,whereheis。Butanyhow,——heregoes!”

  ItcametomeinthesmallhoursthattherealmoraltouchstoneforthisgreatdoubtingofmindwasMarion。Ilaycomposingstatementsofmyproblemandimaginedmyselfdeliveringthemtoher——andshe,goddess-likeandbeautiful;givingherfine,simply-wordedjudgment。

  “Yousee,it’sjusttogiveone’sselfovertotheCapitalisticSystem。”IimaginedmyselfsayingingoodSocialistjargon;“it’ssurrenderingallone’sbeliefs。WeMAYsucceed,weMAYgrowrich,butwherewouldthesatisfactionbe?”

  Thenshewouldsay,“No!Thatwouldn’tberight。”

  “Butthealternativeistowait!”

  Thensuddenlyshewouldbecomeagoddess。Shewouldturnuponmefranklyandnobly,withshiningeyes,witharmsheldout。“No。”

  shewouldsay,“weloveoneanother。Nothingignobleshallevertouchus。Weloveoneanother。Whywaittotelleachotherthat,dear?Whatdoesitmatterthatwearepoorandmaykeeppoor?”

  Butindeedtheconversationdidn’tgoatallinthatdirection。

  Atthesightofhermynocturnaleloquencebecamepreposterousandallthemoralvaluesalteredaltogether。IhadwaitedforheroutsidethedooroftheParsian-robeestablishmentinKensingtonHighStreetandwalkedhomewithherthence。I

  rememberhowsheemergedintothewarmeveninglightandthatsheworeabrownstrawhatthatmadeher,foroncenotonlybeautifulbutpretty。

  “Ilikethathat。”Isaidbywayofopening;andshesmiledherraredelightfulsmileatme。

  “Iloveyou。”Isaidinanundertone,aswejostledcloseronthepavement。

  Sheshookherheadforbiddingly,butshestillsmiled。Then——

  “Besensible!”

  TheHighStreetpavementistoonarrowandcrowdedforconversationandweweresomewaywestwardbeforewespokeagain。

  “Lookhere。”Isaid;“Iwantyou,Marion。Don’tyouunderstand?

  Iwantyou。”

  “Now!”shecriedwarningly。

  Idonotknowifthereaderwillunderstandhowapassionatelover,animmenseadmirationanddesire,canbeshotwithagleamofpositivehatred。Suchagleamtherewasinmeatthesereneself-complacencyofthat“NOW!”ItvanishedalmostbeforeI

  feltit。Ifoundnowarninginitoftheantagonismslatentbetweenus。

  “Marion。”Isaid,“thisisn’tatriflingmattertome。Iloveyou;Iwoulddietogetyou。Don’tyoucare?”

  “Butwhatisthegood?”

  “Youdon’tcare。”Icried。“Youdon’tcarearap!”

  “YouknowIcare。”sheanswered。“IfIdidn’t——IfIdidn’tlikeyouverymuch,shouldIletyoucomeandmeetme——goaboutwithyou?”

  “Wellthen。”Isaid,“promisetomarryme!”

  “IfIdo,whatdifferencewillitmake?”

  Wewereseparatedbytwomencarryingaladderwhodrovebetweenusunawares。

  “Marion。”Iaskedwhenwegottogetheragain,“ItellyouIwantyoutomarryme。”

  “Wecan’t。”

  “Whynot?”

  “Wecan’tmarry——inthestreet。”

  “Wecouldtakeourchance!”

  “Iwishyouwouldn’tgoontalkinglikethis。Whatisthegood?”

  Shesuddenlygavewaytogloom。“It’snogoodmarrying“shesaid。“One’sonlymiserable。I’veseenothergirls。Whenone’saloneonehasalittlepocket-moneyanyhow,onecangoaboutalittle。Butthinkofbeingmarriedandnomoney,andperhapschildren——youcan’tbesure。”

  Shepouredoutthisconcentratedphilosophyofherclassandtypeinjerkyuncompletedsentences,withknittedbrows,withdiscontentedeyestowardsthewestwardglow——forgetful,itseemed,foramomentevenofme。

  “Lookhere,Marion。”Isaidabruptly,“whatwouldyoumarryon?”

  “WhatISthegood?”shebegan。

  “Wouldyoumarryonthreehundredayear?”

  Shelookedatmeforamoment。“That’ssixpoundsaweek。”shesaid。“Onecouldmanageonthat,easily。Smithie’sbrother——No,heonlygetstwohundredandfifty。Hemarriedatypewritinggirl。”

  “WillyoumarrymeifIgetthreehundredayear?”

  Shelookedatmeagain,withacuriousgleamofhope。

  “IF!”shesaid。

  Iheldoutmyhandandlookedherintheeyes。“It’sabargain。”

  Isaid。

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