第85章
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  2Thathewasnever,tomyknowledgeandbelief,leftaloneintheroomwithLadyGlyde。

  3ThatIamnotabletosaywhatcausedthesuddenfright,whichmymistressinformedmehadseizedtheladyonherfirstcomingintothehouse。

  Thecausewasneverexplained,eithertomeortomyfellow-servant。

  Theabovestatementhasbeenreadoverinmypresence。Ihavenothingtoaddtoit,ortotakeawayfromit。Isay,onmyoathasaChristianwoman,thisisthetruth。

  SignedHESTERPINHORN,HerMark。2。THENARRATIVEOFTHEDOCTORTotheRegistraroftheSub-Districtinwhichtheundermentioneddeathtookplace——IherebycertifythatIattendedLadyGlyde,agedTwenty-OnelastBirthday;thatIlastsawheronThursdaythe25thJuly1850;thatshediedonthesamedayatNo。5ForestRoad,StJohn’sWood,andthattheCauseofherdeathDurationofdiseaseAneurismNotknownSignedALFREDGOODRICKE。

  Prof。Title。M。R。C。S。Eng。,L。S。A。

  Address:12CroydonGardens,StJohn’sWood。3。THENARRATIVEOFJANEGOULDIWASthepersonsentinbyMrGoodricketodowhatwasrightandneedfulbytheremainsofaladywhohaddiedatthehousenamedinthecertificatewhichprecedesthis。Ifoundthebodyinchargeoftheservant,HesterPinhorn。Iremainedwithit,andprepareditatthepropertimeforthegrave。Itwaslaidinthecoffininmypresence,andIafterwardssawthecoffinscreweddownprevioustoitsremoval。Whenthathadbeendone,andnotbefore,Ireceivedwhatwasduetomeandleftthehouse。IreferpersonswhomaywishtoinvestigatemycharactertoMrGoodricke。HewillbearwitnessthatIcanbetrustedtotellthetruth。

  SignedJANEGOULD。4。THENARRATIVEOFTHETOMBSTONESACREDTOTHEMEMORYOFLAURA,LADYGLYDE,WIFEOFSIRPERCIVALGLYDE,BART。,OFBLACKWATERPARK,HAMPSHIRE,ANDDAUGHTEROFTHELATEPHILIPFAIRLIE,ESQ。,OFLIMMERIDGEHOUSE,INTHISPARISH。BORNMARCH27TH,1829;MARRIEDDECEMBER22ND,1849;DIEDJULY25TH,1850。5。THENARRATIVEOFWALTERHARTRIGHTEARLYinthesummerof1850IandmysurvivingcompanionsleftthewildsandforestsofCentralAmericaforhome。Arrivedatthecoast,wetookshipthereforEngland。ThevesselwaswreckedintheGulfofMexico——

  Iwasamongthefewsavedfromthesea。Itwasmythirdescapefromperilofdeath。Deathbydisease,deathbytheIndians,deathbydrowning——

  allthreehadapproachedme;allthreehadpassedmeby。

  ThesurvivorsofthewreckwererescuedbyanAmericanvesselboundforLiverpool。TheshipreachedherportonthethirteenthdayofOctober1850。Welandedlateintheafternoon,andIarrivedinLondonthesamenight。

  Thesepagesarenottherecordofmywanderingsandmydangersawayfromhome。Themotiveswhichledmefrommycountryandmyfriendstoanewworldofadventureandperilareknown。Fromthatself-imposedexileIcameback,asIhadhoped,prayed,believedIshouldcomeback——achangedman。InthewatersofanewlifeIhadtemperedmynatureafresh。Inthesternschoolofextremityanddangermywillhadlearnttobestrong,myhearttoberesolute,mymindtorelyonitself。Ihadgoneouttoflyfrommyownfuture。Icamebacktofaceit,asamanshould。

  TofaceitwiththatinevitablesuppressionofmyselfwhichIknewitwoulddemandfromme。Ihadpartedwiththeworstbitternessofthepast,butnotwithmyheart’sremembranceofthesorrowandthetendernessofthatmemorabletime。Ihadnotceasedtofeeltheoneirreparabledisappointmentofmylife——Ihadonlylearnttobearit。LauraFairliewasinallmythoughtswhentheshipboremeaway,andIlookedmylastatEngland。LauraFairliewasinallmythoughtswhentheshipbroughtmeback,andthemorninglightshowedthefriendlyshoreinview。

  Mypentracestheoldlettersasmyheartgoesbacktotheoldlove。

  IwriteofherasLauraFairliestill。Itishardtothinkofher,itishardtospeakofher,byherhusband’sname。

  Therearenomorewordsofexplanationtoaddonmyappearingforthesecondtimeinthesepages。Thisnarrative,ifIhavethestrengthandthecouragetowriteit,maynowgoon。

  Myfirstanxietiesandfirsthopeswhenthemorningcamecentredinmymotherandmysister。Ifeltthenecessityofpreparingthemforthejoyandsurpriseofmyreturn,afteranabsenceduringwhichithadbeenimpossibleforthemtoreceiveanytidingsofmeformonthspast。EarlyinthemorningIsentalettertotheHampsteadCottage,andfolloweditmyselfinanhour’stime。

  Whenthefirstmeetingwasover,whenourquietandcomposureofotherdaysbegangraduallytoreturntous,Isawsomethinginmymother’sfacewhichtoldmethatasecretoppressionlayheavyonherheart。Therewasmorethanlove——therewassorrowintheanxiouseyesthatlookedonmesotenderly——therewaspityinthekindhandthatslowlyandfondlystrengtheneditsholdonmine。Wehadnoconcealmentsfromeachother。Sheknewhowthehopeofmylifehadbeenwrecked——sheknewwhyIhadlefther。ItwasonmylipstoaskascomposedlyasIcouldifanyletterhadcomeformefromMissHalcombe,iftherewasanynewsofhersisterthatImighthear。ButwhenIlookedinmymother’sfaceIlostcouragetoputthequestioneveninthatguardedform。Icouldonlysay,doubtinglyandrestrainedly——

  `Youhavesomethingtotellme。’

  Mysister,whohadbeensittingoppositetous,rosesuddenlywithoutawordofexplanation——roseandlefttheroom。

  Mymothermovedclosertomeonthesofaandputherarmsroundmyneck。

  Thosefondarmstrembled——thetearsflowedfastoverthefaithfullovingface。

  `Walter!’shewhispered,`myowndarling!myheartisheavyforyou,Oh,mysonImysonItrytorememberthatIamstillleft!’

  Myheadsankonherbosom。Shehadsaidallinsayingthosewords。

  Itwasthemorningofthethirddaysincemyreturn——themorningofthesixteenthofOctober。

  Ihadremainedwiththematthecottage——Ihadtriedhardnottoembitterthehappinessofmyreturntothemasitwasembitteredtome。I

  haddoneallmancouldtoriseaftertheshock,andacceptmyliferesignedly——toletmygreatsorrowcomeintendernesstomyheart,andnotindespair。

  Itwasuselessandhopeless。Notearssoothedmyachingeyes,noreliefcametomefrommysister’ssympathyormymother’slove。

  OnthatthirdmorningIopenedmyhearttothem。AtlastthewordspassedmylipswhichIhadlongedtospeakonthedaywhenmymothertoldmeofherdeath。

  `Letmegoawayaloneforalittlewhile,’Isaid。`IshallbearitbetterwhenIhavelookedoncemoreattheplacewhereIfirstsawher——whenIhavekneltandprayedbythegravewheretheyhavelaidhertorest。’

  Idepartedonmyjourney——myjourneytothegraveofLauraFairlie。

  ItwasaquietautumnafternoonwhenIstoppedatthesolitarystation,andsetforthaloneonfootbythewell-rememberedroad。Thewaningsunwasshiningfaintlythroughthinwhiteclouds——theairwaswarmandstill——thepeacefulnessofthelonelycountrywasovershadowedandsaddenedbytheinfluenceofthefallingyear。

  Ireachedthemoor——Istoodagainonthebrowofthehill——Ilookedonalongthepath——andtherewerethefamiliargardentreesinthedistance,theclearsweepingsemicircleofthedrive,thehighwhitewallsofLimmeridgeHouse。Thechancesandchanges,thewanderingsanddangersofmonthsandmonthspast,allshrankandshrivelledtonothinginmymind。Itwaslikeyesterdaysincemyfeethadlasttroddenthefragrantheathyground。I

  thoughtIshouldseehercomingtomeetme,withherlittlestrawhatshadingherface,hersimpledressflutteringintheair,andherwell-filledsketch-bookreadyinherhand。

  Oh,death,thouhastthysting!oh,grave,thouhastthyvictory!

  Iturnedaside,andtherebelowmeintheglenwasthelonesomegreychurch,thePorchwhereIhadwaitedforthecomingofthewomaninwhite,thehillsencirclingthequietburial-ground,thebrookbubblingcoldoveritsstonybed。Therewasthemarblecross,fairandwhite,attheheadofthetomb——thetombthatnowroseovermotheranddaughteralike。

  Iapproachedthegrave。Icrossedoncemorethelowstonestile,andbaredmyheadasItouchedthesacredground。Sacredtogentlenessandgoodness,sacredtoreverenceandgrief。

  Istoppedbeforethepedestalfromwhichthecrossrose。Ononesideofit,onthesidenearesttome,thenewly-cutinscriptionmetmyeyes——thehard,clear,cruelblackletterswhichtoldthestoryofherlifeanddeath。Itriedtoreadthem。Ididreadasfarasthename。`SacredtotheMemoryofLaura——’Thekindblueeyesdimwithtears——thefairheaddroopingwearily——theinnocentpartingwordswhichimploredmetoleaveher——oh,forahappierlastmemoryofherthanthis;thememoryItookawaywithme,thememoryIbringbackwithmetohergrave!

  AsecondtimeItriedtoreadtheinscription。Isawattheendthedateofherdeath,andaboveit——

  Aboveittherewerelinesonthemarble——therewasanameamongthemwhichdisturbedmythoughtsofher。Iwentroundtotheothersideofthegrave,wheretherewasnothingtoread,nothingofearthlyvilenesstoforceitswaybetweenherspiritandmine。

  Ikneltdownbythetomb。Ilaidmyhands,Ilaidmyheadonthebroadwhitestone,andclosedmywearyeyesontheeartharound,onthelightabove。Ilethercomebacktome。Oh,mylove!mylove!myheartmayspeaktoyounow!Itisyesterdayagainsinceweparted——yesterday,sinceyourdearhandlayinmine——yesterday,sincemyeyeslookedtheirlastonyou。Mylove!mylove!

  Timehadflowedon,andsilencehadfallenlikethicknightoveritscourse。

  Thefirstsoundthatcameaftertheheavenlypeacerustledfaintlylikeapassingbreathofairoverthegrassoftheburial-ground。Ihearditnearingmeslowly,untilitcamechangedtomycar——camelikefootstepsmowingonward——thenstopped。

  Ilookedup。

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