第13章
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  fromthispositionofhelplessnessandhumiliationIwasrescuedbyMissHalcombe。Herlipstoldmethebitter,thenecessary,theunexpectedtruth;herheartykindnesssustainedmeundertheshockofhearingit;

  hersenseandcourageturnedtoitsrightuseaneventwhichthreatenedtheworstthatcouldhappen,tomeandtoothers,inLimmeridgeHouse。IXItwasonaThursdayintheweek,andnearlyattheendofthethirdmonthofmysojourninCumberland。

  Inthemorning,whenIwentdownintothebreakfast-roomattheusualhour,MissHalcombe,forthefirsttimesinceIhadknownher,wasabsentfromhercustomaryplaceatthetable。

  MissFairliewasoutonthelawn。Shebowedtome,butdidnotcomein。Notawordhaddroppedfrommylips,orfromhers,thatcouldunsettleeitherofus——andyetthesameunacknowledgedsenseofembarrassmentmadeusshrinkalikefrommeetingoneanotheralone。Shewaitedonthelawn,andIwaitedinthebreakfast-room,tillMrsVeseyorMissHalcombecamein。HowquicklyIshouldhavejoinedher:howreadilyweshouldhaveshakenhands,andglidedintoourcustomarytalk,onlyafortnightago。

  InafewminutesMissHalcombeentered。Shehadapreoccupiedlook,andshemadeherapologiesforbeinglateratherabsently。

  `Ihavebeendetained,’shesaid。`byaconsultationwithMrFairlieonadomesticmatterwhichhewishedtospeaktomeabout。’

  MissFairliecameinfromthegarden,andtheusualmorninggreetingpassedbetweenus。Herhandstruckcoldertominethanever。Shedidnotlookatme,andshewasverypale。EvenMrsVeseynoticedwhensheenteredtheroomamomentafter。

  `Isupposeitisthechangeinthewind,’saidtheoldlady。`Thewinteriscoming——ah,mylove,thewinteriscomingsoon!’

  Inherheartandinmineithadcomealready!

  Ourmorningmeal——oncesofullofpleasantgood-humoureddiscussionoftheplansfortheday——wasshortandsilent。MissFairlieseemedtofeeltheoppressionofthelongpausesintheconversation,andlookedappealinglytohersistertofillthemup。MissHalcombe,afteronceortwicehesitatingandcheckingherself,inamostuncharacteristicmanner,spokeatlast。

  `Ihaveseenyourunclethismorning,Laura,’shesaid。`Hethinksthepurpleroomistheonethatoughttobegotready,andheconfirmswhatItoldyou。Mondayistheday——notTuesday。’

  WhilethesewordswerebeingspokenMissFairlielookeddownatthetablebeneathher。Herfingersmovednervouslyamongthecrumbsthatwerescatteredonthecloth。Thepalenessonhercheeksspreadtoherlips,andthelipsthemselvestrembledvisibly。Iwasnottheonlypersonpresentwhonoticedthis。MissHalcombesawit,too,andatoncesetustheexampleofrisingfromtable。

  MrsVeseyandMissFairlielefttheroomtogether。Thekindsorrowfulblueeyeslookedatme,foramoment,withtheprescientsadnessofacomingandalongfarewell。Ifelttheansweringpanginmyownheart——thepangthattoldmeImustlosehersoon,andloveherthemoreunchangeablyfortheloss。

  Iturnedtowardsthegardenwhenthedoorhadclosedonher。MissHalcombewasstandingwithherhatinherhand,andhershawloverherarm,bythelargewindowthatledouttothelawn,andwaslookingatmeattentively。

  `Haveyouanyleisuretimetospare,’sheasked,`beforeyoubegintoworkinyourownroom?’

  `Certainly,MissHalcombe。Ihavealwaystimeatyourservice。’

  `Iwanttosayawordtoyouinprivate,MrHartright。Getyourhatandcomeoutintothegarden。Wearenotlikelytobedisturbedthereatthishourinthemorning。’

  Aswesteppedoutontothelawn,oneoftheunder-gardeners——amerelad——passedusonhiswaytothehouse,withaletterinhishand。MissHalcombestoppedhim。

  `Isthatletterforme?’sheasked。

  `Nay,miss;it’sjustsaidtobeforMissFairlie,’answeredthelad,holdingouttheletterashespoke。

  MissHalcombetookitfromhimandlookedattheaddress。

  `Astrangehandwriting,’shesaidtoherself。`WhocanLaura’scorrespondentbe?Wheredidyougetthis?’shecontinued,addressingthegardener,`Well,miss,’saidthelad,`ljustgotitfromawoman。’

  `Whatwoman?’

  `Awomanwellstrickeninage。’

  `Oh,anoldwoman。Anyoneyouknew?’

  `Icannatak’itonmysel’tosaythatshewasotherthanastrangertome。’

  `Whichwaydidshego?’

  `Thatgate,’saidtheunder-gardener,turningwithgreatdeliberationtowardsthesouth,andembracingthewholeofthatpartofEnglandwithonecomprehensivesweepofhisarm。

  `Curious,’saidMissHalcombe;`Isupposeitmustbeabegging-letter。

  There,’sheadded,handingtheletterbacktothelad,`takeittothehouse,andgiveittooneoftheservants。Andnow,MrHartright,ifyouhavenoobjection,letuswalkthisway。’

  Sheledmeacrossthelawn,alongthesamepathbywhichIhadfollowedheronthedayaftermyarrivalatLimmeridge。Atthelittlesummer-house,inwhichLauraFairlieandIhadfirstseeneachother,shestopped,andbrokethesilencewhichshehadsteadilymaintainedwhilewewerewalkingtogether。

  `WhatIhavetosaytoyouIcansayhere。’

  Withthosewordssheenteredthesummer-house,tookoneofthechairsatthelittleroundtableinside,andsignedtometotaketheother。I

  suspectedwhatwascomingwhenshespoketomeinthebreakfast-room;I

  feltcertainofitnow。

  `MrHartright,’shesaid,`Iamgoingtobeginbymakingafrankavowaltoyou。Iamgoingtosay——withoutphrase-making,whichIdetest,orpayingcompliments,whichIheartilydespise——thatIhavecome,inthecourseofyourresidencewithus,tofeelastrongfriendlyregardforyou。Iwaspredisposedinyourfavourwhenyoufirsttoldmeofyourconducttowardsthatunhappywomanwhomyoumetundersuchremarkablecircumstances。

  Yourmanagementoftheaffairmightnothavebeenprudent,butitshowedtheself-control,thedelicacy,andthecompassionofamanwhowasnaturallyagentleman。Itmademeexpectgoodthingsfromyou,andyouhavenotdisappointedmyexpectations。’

  Shepaused——butheldupherhandatthesametime,asasignthatsheawaitednoanswerfrommebeforesheproceeded。WhenIenteredthesummer-house,nothoughtwasinmeofthewomaninwhite。Butnow,MissHalcombe’sownwordshadputthememoryofmyadventurebackinmymind。

  Itremainedtherethroughouttheinterview——remained,andnotwithoutaresult。

  `Asyourfriend,’sheproceeded,`Iamgoingtotellyou,atonce,inmyownplain,blunt,downrightlanguage,thatIhavediscoveredyoursecret——withouthelporhint,mind,fromanyoneelse。MrHartright,youhavethoughtlesslyallowedyourselftoformanattachment——aseriousanddevotedattachment,Iamafraid——tomysisterLaura。Idon’tputyoutothepainofconfessingitinsomanywords,becauseIseeandknowthatyouaretoohonesttodenyit。Idon’tevenblameyou——Ipityyouforopeningyourhearttoahopelessaffection。Youhavenotattemptedtotakeanyunderhandadvantage——youhavenotspokentomysisterinsecret。Youareguiltyofweaknessandwantofattentiontoyourownbestinterests,butofnothingworse。Ifyouhadacted,inanysinglerespect,lessdelicatelyandlessmodestly,Ishouldhavetoldyoutoleavethehouse,withoutaninstant’snotice,oraninstant’sconsultationofanybody。Asitis,I

  blamethemisfortuneofyouryearsandyourposition——Idon’tblameyou。

  Shakehands——Ihavegivenyoupain;Iamgoingtogiveyoumore,butthereisnohelpforit——shakehandswithyourfriend,MarianHalcombe,first。’

  Thesuddenkindness——thewarm,high-minded,fearlesssympathywhichmetmeonsuchmercyequalterms,whichappealedwithsuchdelicateandgenerousabruptnessstraighttomyheart,myhonour,andmycourage,overcamemeinaninstant。Itriedtolookatherwhenshetookmyhand,butmyeyesweredim。Itriedtothankher,butmyvoicefailedme。

  `Listentome,’shesaid,consideratelyavoidingallnoticeofmylossofself-control。`Listentome,andletusgetitoveratonce。ItisarealtruerelieftomethatIamnotobliged,inwhatIhavenowtosay,toenterintothequestion——thehardandcruelquestionasIthinkit——ofsocialinequalities。Circumstanceswhichwilltryyoutothequick,sparemetheungraciousnecessityofpainingamanwhohaslivedinfriendlyintimacyunderthesameroofwithmyselfbyanyhumiliatingreferencetomattersofrankandstation。YoumustleaveLimmeridgeHouse,MrHartright,beforemoreharmisdone。Itismydutytosaythattoyou;

  anditwouldbeequallymydutytosayit,underpreciselythesameseriousnecessity,ifyouweretherepresentativeoftheoldestandwealthiestfamilyinEngland。Youmustleaveus,notbecauseyouareateacherofdrawing——’

  Shewaitedamoment,turnedherfacefullonme,andreachingacrossthetable,laidherhandfirmlyonmyarm。

  `Notbecauseyouareateacherofdrawing,’sherepeated,`butbecauseLauraFairlieisengagedtobemarried。’

  Thelastwordwentlikeabullettomyheart。Myarmlostallsensationofthehandthatgraspedit。Inevermovedandneverspoke。Thesharpautumnbreezethatscatteredthedeadleavesatourfeetcameascoldtome,onasudden,asifmyownmadhopesweredeadleavestoo,whirledawaybythewindliketherest。Hopes!Betrothed,ornotbetrothed,shewasequallyfarfromme。Wouldothermenhaverememberedthatinmyplace?NotiftheyhadlovedherasIdid。

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