\"It\'snothing,\"Isaid,andpretendedtoabandonthequest——toberenewedlater.Butthisrusefailed;theycontinuedobstinatelytosearch;andafterafewminutesTom,withashout,pickedoutofahotcrevicebetweenthebricks——anickel!
\"It\'smine!\"Icriedfiercely.
\"Didyouloseit?\"demandedJulia,thecannyone,asTomwasabouttogiveitup.
Mylyingwasgenerallyreservedformyelders.
\"N-no,\"Isaidhesitatingly,\"butit\'smineallthesame.Itwas——senttome.\"
\"Senttoyou!\"theyexclaimed,inachorusofprotestandderision.Andhow,indeed,wasItomakegoodmyclaim?ThePeterses,whenassembled,wereaclan,ledbyJuliaandinmattersofcontroversy,movedasone.
HowwasItotellthemthatinanswertomyprayersfortwenty-fivecents,Godhaddeemedfiveallthatwasgoodforme?
\"Some——somebodydroppeditthereforme.\"
\"Who?\"demandedthechorus.\"Say,that\'sagoodone!\"
Tearssuddenlyblindedme.Overcomebychagrin,Iturnedandflewintothehouseandupstairsintomyroom,lockingthedoorbehindme.Anintervalensued,duringwhichInursedmysenseofwrong,anditpleasedmetothinkthatthemoneywouldbringacurseonthePetersfamily.Atlengththerecameaknockonthedoor,andavoicecallingmyname.
\"Hugh!Hugh!\"
ItwasTom.
\"Hughie,won\'tyouletmein?Iwanttogiveyouthenickel.\"
\"Keepit!\"Ishoutedback.\"Youfoundit.\"
Anotherinterval,andthenmoreknocking.
\"Openup,\"hesaidcoaxingly.\"I——Iwanttotalktoyou.\"
Irelented,andlethimin.Hepressedthecoinintomyhand.I
refused;hepleaded.
\"Youfoundit,\"Isaid,\"it\'syours.\"
\"But——butyouwerelookingforit.\"
\"Thatmakesnodifference,\"Ideclaredmagnanimously.
Curiosityovercamehim.
\"Say,Hughie,ifyoudidn\'tdropit,whoonearthdid?\"
\"Nobodyonearth,\"Irepliedcryptically
Naturally,Ideclinedtorevealthesecret.NorwasthisbyanymeanstheonlysecretIheldoverthePetersfamily,whoneverquiteknewwhattomakeofme.Theywerenottroubledwithimaginations.JuliawasalittleolderthanTomandhadasharptongue,butoverhimIexercisedadistinctfascination,andIknewit.Literalhimself,good-naturedandwarm-hearted,thegiftIhadoftingeinglifewithromancetoputthethingoptimistically,ofcreatingkingdomsoutofbackyards——atwhichJuliaandRussellsniffed——heldhisallegiancefirm.
II.
ImusthavebeenabouttwelveyearsofagewhenIrealizedthatIwaspossessedofthebard\'sinheritance.AmomentousjourneyImadewithmyparentstoBostonaboutthistimenotonlystimulatedthisgift,butgavemetheadvantageofwhichothertravellersbeforemehavelikewiseavailedthemselves——ofbeingabletotakecertainpoeticlibertieswithadistantlandthatmyfriendsathomehadneverseen.OftenduringtheheatofsummernoonswhenwewereassembledunderthebigmaplebesidethelatticefenceinthePeters\'yard,thespiritwouldmovemetorelatethemostamazingofadventures.Ourtrain,forinstance,hadbeenheldupinthenightbyabandofrobbersinblackmasks,andrescuedbyatravellerwhoboreastrikingresemblancetomyCousinRobertBreck.Hehadshottwooftherobbers.Thesefabrications,oncestarted,flowedfrommewithridiculousease.Iexperiencedanunwontedexhilaration,exaltation;Ibegantobelievethattheyhadactuallyoccurred.InvaintheastuteJuliaassertedthattherewerenotrainrobbersintheeast.
Whathadmyfatherdone?Well,hehadbeenverybrave,buthehadhadnopistol.HadIbeenfrightened?No,notatall;I,too,hadwishedforapistol.Whyhadn\'tIspokenofthisbefore?Well,somanythingshadhappenedtomeIcouldn\'ttellthemallatonce.ItwasplainthatJulia,thoughoftenfascinatedagainstherwill,deemedthissortofthingdistinctlyimmoral.
Iwasaboydividedintwo.Onepartofmedweltinafancifulrealmofhisownweaving,andtheotherpartwasacommonplaceandprotestinginhabitantofaworldoflessons,disappointmentsanddiscipline.Myinstinctswerenotvicious.Ideasbubbledupwithinmecontinuallyfromanapparentlyinexhaustiblespring,andtheverystrengthofthelongingstheysetinmotionpuzzledandtroubledmyparents:whatIseemtoseemostdistinctlynowisayoungmindengagedinaceaselessstruggleforself-expression,forself-development,againsttheinertiaofatraditionofwhichmyfatherwastheembodiment.Hewasanenigmatomethen.Hesincerelylovedme,hecherishedambitionsconcerningme,yetthwartedeverynatural,buddinggrowth,untilIgrewunconsciouslytoregardhimasmyenemy,althoughIhadanaffectionforhimandaprideinhimthatflaredupattimes.Insteadofconfidingtohimmyaspirations,vaguethoughtheywere,IbecamemoreandmoresecretiveasIgrewolder.I
knewinstinctivelythatheregardedtheseaspirationsasevidencesinmycharacterofseriousmoralflaws.AndIwouldsoonerhavesufferedmanyafternoonsofhisfavouritepunishment——solitaryconfinementinmyroom——
thanrevealtohimthoseoccasionalfitsofcreativefancywhichcausedmetoneglectmylessonsinordertoputthemonpaper.Lovingliterature,inhisway,hewascharacteristicallyincapableofrecognizingtheliteraryinstinct,andthesymptomsofitsearlystageshemistookforinherentfrivolity,forlackofrespectforthetruth;inbrief,fororiginalsin.AttheageoffourteenIhadbegunsecretlyalas,howmanythingsIdidsecretly!towritestoriesofasort,storiesthatneverwerefinished.
Heregardedreadingasduty,notpleasure.Helaidoutbooksforme,whichIneglected.HewaspartandparcelofthatAmericanenvironmentinwhichliteraryambitionwasregardedassheermadness.Andnoonewhohasnotexperiencedthatenvironmentcanhaveanyconceptionofthepressureitexertedtostifleoriginality,tothrustthenewgenerationintoitsreligiousandcommercialmoulds.Shallweever,Iwonder,developtheenlightenededucationthatwillknowhowtotakeadvantageofsuchinitiativeaswasmine?thatwillbeonthewatchforit,sympathizewithitandguideittofruition?
Iwasconsciousofstillanothercreativeneed,thatofdramatizingmyideas,ofconvertingthemintoaction.Andthisneedwastoleadmefartherthaneverafieldfromthepathofrighteousness.Theconcreterealizationofideas,asmanygeniuseswilltestify,isanexpensiveundertaking,requiringalittlepocketmoney;andIhavealreadytoucheduponthatsubject.Myfatherdidnotbelieveinpocketmoney.AseastorythatmyCousinDonaldEwangavemeatChristmasinspiredmetocomposeoneofasomewhatdifferentnature;incidentally,IdeemeditavastimprovementonCousinDonald\'sbook.Now,ifIonlyhadaboat,withtheassistanceofHamDurrettandTomPeters,GeneHollisterandPerryBlackwoodandotherfriends,thisstoryofminemightbestaged.
Therewere,however,asusual,certainseeminglyinsuperabledifficulties:inthefirstplace,itwaswintertime;inthesecond,nofacilitiesexistedinthecityforoperationsofanauticalcharacter;
and,lastly,myChristmasmoneyamountedonlytofivedollars.
Itwasmyfatherwhopointedouttheseandotherobjections.For,afteracarefulperusalofthepricelistsIhadsentfor,Ihadbeenforcedtoappealtohimtosupplyadditionalfundswithwhichtopurchasearow-
boat.Incidentally,hereadmealectureonextravagance,referredtomylastmonth\'sreportattheAcademy,andfinishedbydeclaringthathewouldnotpermitmetohaveaboateveninthehighlyimprobablecaseofsomebody\'spresentingmewithone.Letitnotbeimaginedthatmyardourormydeterminationwereextinguished.ShortlyafterIhadretiredfromhispresenceitoccurredtomethathehadsaidnothingtoforbidmymakingaboat,andthefirstthingIdidafterschoolthatdaywastoprocure,fortwenty-fivecents,asecond-handbookonboatconstruction.
Thewoodshedwaschosenasashipbuildingestablishment.Itwasconvenient——andmyfatherneverwentintothebackyardincoldweather.
Inquiriesoflumber-yardsdevelopingthedisconcertingfactthatfourdollarsandseventy-fivecentswasinadequatetobuythematerialitself,tosaynothingofthecostofsteamingandbendingtheribs,I
reluctantlyabandonedtheidealofthegracefulcraftIhadsketched,andcompromisedonaflatbottom.Observehowthewaysofdeceptionleadtotransgression:Irecalledthecast-offlumberpileofJarvis,thecarpenter,agood-naturedEnglishman,coarseandfat:inourneighbourhoodhisreputationforobscenitywassowellknowntomothersthatIhadbeenforbiddentogonearhimorhisshop.GritsJarvis,hisson,whohadinheritedthetalent,wasalsocontraband.IcanseenowthehugebulkoftheelderJarvisashestoodinthemelting,soot-
powderedsnowinfrontofhisshop,andhearhiscommentsonmypertinacity.
\"Ifyoueverwantsanotherman\'smissuswhenyougrowsup,mylad,Gawd\'elp\'im!\"
\"WhyshouldIwantanotherman\'swifewhenIdon\'twantoneofmyown?\"
Idemanded,indignant.
Helaughedwithhiscustomarylackofmoderation.
\"YoumindwhatoldJarvissays,\"hecried.\"Whatyouwants,yougets.\"
Ididgethisboards,bysheerinsistence.Nodoubttheywerenotveryvaluable,andwithoutquestionhemorethanmadeupfortheminmymother\'sbill.Ialsogotsomethingelseofequalvaluetomeatthemoment,——theassistanceofGrits,thecontraband;daily,afterschool,I
smuggledhimintotheshedthroughthealley,acquiringlikewisetheservicesofTomPeters,whichwasmoreofatriumphthanitwouldseem.
Tomalwayshadtobe\"workedup\"toparticipationinmyideas,butintheendhealmostinvariablysuccumbed.Thenotionofbuildingaboatinthedeadofwinter,andsofarfromhernativeelement,naturallystruckhimatfirstasridiculous.WhereinJehoshaphatwasIgoingtosailitifI
evergotitmade?Hemuchpreferredtothrowsnowballsatinnocentwagondrivers.
AllthatTomsaw,atfirst,wasadirty,coal-spatteredshedwithdimrecesses,foritwaslightedononesideonly,anditstemperaturewassomewherebelowfreezing.Surelyhecouldnotbeblamedforatemperedenthusiasm!Butforme,allthedirtandcoldanddiscomfortwereblottedout,andIbeheldagallantcraftmannedbysturdyseamenforgingherwayacrossbluewaterintheSouthSeas.TreasureIsland,alas,wasasyetunwritten;butamongmyfather\'sbooksweretwooldvolumesinwhichIhadhithertotakennointerest,withcrudeengravingsofpalmsandcoralreefs,ofnakedsavagesandtropicalmountainscoveredwithjungle,theadventures,inbrief,ofoneCaptainCook.Ialsodiscoveredabookbyalatertraveller.Spurredonbyamysteriousmotivepower,andtothegreatneglectoftheponsasinorumandthestapleproductsoftheSouthernStates,Igatheredanamazingamountofinformationconcerningaremoteportionoftheglobe,ofhead-huntersandpoisonedstakes,oftyphoons,ofqueerwar-craftthatcreptuponyouwhileyouweredismantlinggalleons,whendesperatehand-to-handencountersensued.
LittlebylittleasIwoveallthisintopersonaladventuressoontoberealized,Tomforgotthesnowballsandthemaddenedgrocery-menwhochasedhimaroundtheblock;whileGritswouldoccasionallystopsawingandcryout:——
\"Ah,s\'y!\"frequentlyaddingthathewouldbeG——d——d.
ThecoldwoodshedbecameachantryontheNewEnglandcoast,thealleythewintryseasoontoembraceourship,thesaw-horses——whichstoodbetweenacoal-binononesideandunusedstallsfilledwithrubbishandkindlingontheother——theways;theyardbehindthelatticefencebecameabackwater,theflappingclothesthesailsofshipsthattookrefugethere——onMondaysandTuesdays.Evenmyfatherwassymbolizedwithunparalleledaudacityasawatchfulgovernmentwhichhad,uptothepresent,noinklingofoursemi-piraticalintentions!Thecookandthehousemaid,thoughremonstratingagainstthepresenceofGrits,werefriendlyconfederates;likewiseoldCephas,thedarkeywho,frommyearliestmemory,carriedcoalandwoodandblackedtheshoes,washedthewindows,andscrubbedthesteps.
OneafternoonTomwenttowork
ThehistoryofthebuildingofthegoodshipPetrelissimilartothatofallcreatedthings,astoryoftrialanderrorandwaste.Atlast,oneMarchdayshestoodreadyforlaunching.Shehadevenbeencaulked;forGrits,fromanunknownandunquestionablydubioussource,hadprocuredabucketoftar,whichweheatedoverafireinthealleyandsmearedintoeverycrack.Itwasnaturalthatthenewsofsuchafeataswewereaccomplishingshouldhaveleakedout,thatthe\"yard\"shouldhavebeenvisitedfromtimetotimebyinterestedfriends,someofwhomcametoadmire,sometoscoff,andalltospeculate.Amongthescoffers,ofcourse,wasRalphHambleton,whostoodwithhishandsinhispocketsandcheerfullypredictedallsortsofdirecalamities.Ralphwasalwaysasuperiorboy,tallandatriflesaturnineandcynical,withanamazingself-confidencenotwhollyduetothewealthofhisfather,theiron-
master.HewasolderthanI.
\"Shewon\'tfloatfiveminutes,ifyouevergethertothewater,\"washiscomment,andinthishewassupportedongeneralprinciplesbyJuliaandRussellPeters.RalphwouldhavenoneofthePetrel,oroftheSouthSeaseither;buthewanted,——sohesaid,——\"tobeinatthedeath.\"TheHambletonswereoneofthefewfamilieswhoatthattimewenttotheseaforthesummer,andfromapracticalknowledgeofcraftingeneralRalphwasnotslowtopointoutthedefectsofours.TomandIdefendedherpassionately.
Ralphwasnotaromanticist.Hewasabornleader,excellingatorganizedgames,exercisingoverboysthesortoffascinationthatcomesfromdoingeverythingbetterandmoreeasilythanothers.ItwasonlyduringtheprogressofsuchenterprisesasthisaffairofthePetrelthatIsucceededinwinningtheirallegiance;bitbybit,asTom\'shadbeenwon,fanningtheirenthusiasmbyimpersonatingatonceAchillesandHomer,recruitingwhilerelatingtheOdysseyoftheexpeditioninglowingcolours.Ralphalwaysscoffed,andwhenIhadnoschemeonfoottheywentbacktohim.Havingsurveyedtheboatandpredictedcalamity,hedeparted,leavingacircleofquaintandyouthfulfiguresaroundthePetrelintheshed:GeneHollister,romanticallyinclined,yetsomewhathamperedbyastrictparentalsupervision;Ralph\'scousinHamDurrett,whowaseventhenaratherfatboy,good-naturedbutselfish;DonandHarryEwan,mysecondcousins;MacandNancyWillettandSamandSophyMcAlery.Nancywasatomboy,nottobedenied,andSophyhershadow.Weheldacouncil,theall-importantquestionofwhichwashowtogetthePetreltothewater,andwhatwatertogetherto.Theriverwasnottobethoughtof,andBlackstoneLakesomesixmilesfromtown.Finally,Logan\'smill-pondwasdecidedon,——amuddysheetontheoutskirtsofthecity.ButhowtogethertoLogan\'smill-pond?Cephaswasatlengthconsulted.ItturnedoutthathehadacolouredfriendwhowentbytheimpressivenameofThomasJeffersonTaliaferropronouncedTolliver,whowasintheexpressbusiness;andwho,aftersurveyingtheboatwithsomemisgivings,——forshewastenfeetlong,——finallyconsentedtotransportherto\"tide-water\"forthesumoftwodollars.Butitprovedthatourcombinedresourcesonlyamountedtoadollarandseventy-fivecents.HamDurrettnevercontributedtoanything.OnthissumThomasJeffersoncompromised.
Saturdaydawnedclear,withastiffMarchwindcatchingupthedustintoeddiesandwhirlingitdownthestreet.NosoonerwasmyfathersafelyonhiswaytohisofficethanThomasJeffersonwasreportedtobeinthealley,whereweassembled,surveyingwithsomemisgivingsThomasJefferson\'ssteed,whoseabilitytohaulthePetreltwomilesseemedsomewhatdoubtful.Otherdifficultiesdeveloped;thedoorinthebackoftheshedprovedtobetoonarrowforourship\'sbeam.Butmenembarkedonadesperateenterprisearenottobestoppedbysuchtrifles,andtheproblemwassolvedbysawingouttwoadjoiningboards.Thesewereafterwardsreplacedwithskillbytheship\'scarpenter,AbleSeamanGritsJarvis.ThenthePetrelbyheroiceffortswasgotintothewagon,theseatofwhichhadbeenremoved,oldThomasJeffersonperchedhimselfprecariouslyinthebowandprotestinglygathereduphisrope-patchedreins.
\"Folks\'ll\'lowI\'seplumcrazy,drivin\'disyereboat,\"hedeclared,observingwithconcernthatsomefourfeetofthesternprojectedoverthetail-board.\"Efshetopples,I\'llgittoheavenquicker\'nabullet.\"
Whenoneisshanghaied,however,——inthehandsofbuccaneers,——itistoolatetowithdraw.SixshouldersupheldtherearendofthePetrel,othersshoved,andThomasJefferson\'sricketyhorsebegantomoveforwardinspiteofhimself.Anexpressionofsheerterrormighthavebeenobservedontheoldnegro\'scrinkledface,buthisvoicewasdrowned,andwesweptoutofthealley.Scarcelyhadwetravelledablockbeforewebegantobejoinedbyalltheboysalongthelineofmarch;marbles,tops,andevenincipientbaseballgameswereabandonedthatSaturdaymorning;peopleranoutoftheirhouses,teamstershaltedtheircarts.
Thebreathlessexcitement,theexaltationIhadfeltonleavingthealleywerenowtingedwithotherfeelings,unanticipated,butnotwhollylackingindelectablequality,——concernandaweattheseunforeseenforcesIhadraised,atthisevergrowingandenthusiasticbodyofvolunteersspringinguplikedragon\'steethinourpath.Afterall,wasnotItheheroofthistriumphalprocession?Thethoughtwasconsoling,exhilarating.AndherewasNancymarchingatmyside,alittlesubdued,perhaps,butunquestionablyadmiringandrealizingthatitwasIwhohadcreatedallthis.Nancy,whowastheaptestofpupils,themostloyaloffollowers,thoughIdidnotyetvalueherdevotionatitsrealworth,becauseshewasagirl.Herimaginationkindledatmytouch.Andonthiseventfuloccasionshecarriedinherarmsaparcel,thecontentsofwhichwereunknowntoallbutourselves.AtlengthwereachedthemuddyshoresofLogan\'spond,wheretwoscoreeagerhandsvolunteeredtoassistthePetrelintohernativeelement.
Alas!thattherealityneverattainstothevision.Ihadbeheld,inmydreams,thePetrelabouttotakethewater,andNancyWillettstandingverystraightmakingalittlespeechandcrashingabottleofwineacrossthebows.Thiswasthecontentofthemysteriousparcel;shehadstolenitfromherfather\'scellar.Butthenumberofuninvitedspectators,whichhadnotbeenforeseen,considerablymodifiedtheprogramme,——asthenewspaperswouldhavesaid.Theypushedandcrowdedaroundtheship,andmadefrankandevenbrutalremarksastoherseaworthiness;evenNancy,inuredthoughshewastothemasculinesex,hadfledtotheheights,anditlookedatthissuprememomentasthoughweshouldhavetofightforthePetrel.Anattempttomusterherdoughtybuccaneersfailed;thegunnertoohadfled,——GeneHollister;HamDurrettandtheEwanseswerenowheretobeseen,andamusterrevealedonlyTom,thefidusAchates,andGritsJarvis.