\"Youmighthavebeenoneofthefriendsofthefamilyandscarcelyhavelearnedthefact.Indeed,poorman,heonlyabouthalfexists,forhehasbeensolongovershadowedbyhisfashionablewifeanddaughter,thatheisbutasicklyplantofaman.\"
VanBergsawthatthegreetingreceivedbyMr.Mayhewfromhiswifeanddaughterwasveryundemonstrativetosaytheleast,andthatthenthegentlemanquicklydisappeared,asiffearingthathemightbeintheway.
\"Frommyverylimitedmeansofjudging,\"VanBergremarked,\"I
cannotseeanythingmoreobjectionableintheheadofthefamilythanintheothermembers.\"
\"Yourphrase,\'headofthefamily,\'asappliedtoMr.Mayhew,makesmesmile.Hisnamefiguresattheheadofthelargefamilybills,butscarcelyelsewherewithmuchprominence.Youwillsoonlearn,ifyouremainhere,thatMr.Mayhewimbibesrathermorethanisgoodforhim,soImayaswellmentionthedisagreeablefactatonce.Buttodothepoormanjustice,Isupposehedrinkstokeephisspiritsuptotheordinarylevel,ratherthanfromanyhopeofbecomingalittlejollyoccasionally.WhymyauntmarriedhimIscarcelyknow;andyetIhaveoftenthoughtthathemightbeaverydifferentdidshenotsoquenchhimbyamannerallherown.
Asitis,hislifeseemstoconsistoftoilingandmoilingalltheweek,andofstolidlyandjoylesslysoakinghimselfintosemi-stupidityonSunday.ItthiswretchedstateofaffairscouldbekeptsecretIwouldnotmentioniteventoyou,myintimatefriend;but,sinceitcontinuesnosecretwherevertheyhappentoremainforanylengthoftime,Iwouldrathertellyoutheexacttruthatonce,thanpermityoutoguessatitthroughdistortedrumors.Asyouartistsoccasionallyexpressyourselvesconcerningpictures,soIsupposeyouwillthinkthatthisfamily,withallitswealthisquitelackingintone.\"
\"Well,Stanton,ImustadmitthatIfindmyselfchieflyinclinedtowardsthesubduedandneutral-tintedMr.Mayhew.IfyouhaveachanceIwishyouwouldintroducemetohim.\"
\"Areyouinearnest?\"
\"Certainly.\"
\"ThenI\'llaskhimtosmokewithusaftersupper.Well,Van,Icongratulateyouagainthatyourcorrectandcultivatedtasteenabledyoutoseethefatalflawinmycousin\'sbeauty.Ifyouhadbeenbewitchedbyher,andhadinsistedonimaginingassomanyothershavedonethatherfaultlessfeatureswerethereflexofwhatsheisorcouldbecomeinmindandcharacter,Imighthavehadagooddealoftroublewithyou;foryouareamulishfellowwhenyougetapurposeinyourhead.Idon\'tcarehowbadlysingedtheaveragerunofmothsbecome.Youmayseetwoorthreeflutteringaroundto-night,ifyoucaretolookon,butIwishnofriendofminetomakesport,atseriouscosttohimself,foryonderincorrigiblecoquette,ifsheismycousin.Butafterwhatyouhaveseenandnowknow,youwouldbesafeenough,evenifpredisposedtofolly.Thelittleminx!butIpunishedherwellforherspitethisafternoon.\"
\"OmostprudentUlysses!youhaveindeedfilledmyearswithwax.
Ithankyouallthesameasifmydangerweregreater.\"
\"Well,viewthemallwithsuchcharityasyoucan.Ihopeyouwerenotverymuchannoyedbythelossofyourride.Theyoungladywillnotbeinahurrytoplaysuchatrickagain.I\'lljoinyouaftersupperinthisyourfavoriteandout-of-the-waycorner.\"
\"Wasbeautyeverenvironedwithinandwithoutbysuchdesperatelyprosaicandinartisticsurroundings?\"musedVanBerg.\"Itglistenslikealostjewelinanash-barrel;or,morecorrectly,itislikeanexquisiteflowerthatnaturehasperverselymadetheoutcomeofarankandpoisonousvine.Ofcoursetheflowerispoisonousalso,andassoonasitsfirstdelicatebloomisover,willgrowasrankandrepulsiveasthevinethatbearsit.Likeproduceslike;andwithsuchparentage,whathopeisthereforher?Iamgladnoonesuspectsmyabsurdproject;foreveryhourconvincesmeofitsimpracticability.TheancientUndinewasamyth,andmymodernUndinemightbecalledawhitelie,butonethatwillgrowdarkereveryday.Atadistanceshepresentsthesemblanceofaveryfairwoman,butIhavebeenunabletodetectasingleelementyetthatwillpreventherfromdevelopingintoanoldanduglyhag,inspiteofallthatartandcostumecandoforher.\"
AftersupperStantonbroughtMr.MayhewtoVanBerg\'sretirednook,andtheartistgavethehandoftheweary,listlessmansuchacordialpressureastocausehimaslightsurprise,butaftersatisfyinghisfaintinterestbyabriefglance,heturnedthebackofhischairtowardsallthegaycompany,althoughitcontainedhiswifeanddaughter,puffedmechanicallyathiscigar,andlookedvacantlyintospace.Beforetheeveningwasover,however,Vanberghaddrawnfromhimseveralquiteanimatedremarks,andsecuredthepromisethathewouldjoinhimandStantoninarambleimmediatelyafterbreakfastthefollowingmorning.
Norhadtheyoungmanbeenobliviousofthedaughterwhonowseemedinhernativeelement.Fromhisduskypointofobservationhecaughtfrequentglimpsesofher,nowwhirlingthroughawaltzintheparlor,nowtalkingandlaughinginaratherpronouncedwayfromthemidstofagroupofgentlemen,andagaincoquettishlystealingoffwithoneofthemthroughthemoonlitwalks.Hermanner,whetherassumedorreal,wasthatofextravagantgaiety.Occasionallysheseemedtoglancetowardstheirobscurecorner,butneithershenorhermothercametoseekthemanwhohadbeentoilingalltheweektomaintaintheiridleluxury.
AsMrs.Mayhewandherdaughterwerepreparingfordinneronthefollowingday,Mr.Mayhewenteredwithabriskerstepthanusual.
\"Why,father,wherehaveyoubeen?\"Idaasked,surprisedbythefactthathehadnotbeendrinkinganddozinginhisroomallthemorning.
\"IhavebeenshownaglimpseofsomethingthatIhavenotseenformanyyears.\"
\"Indeed,andwhatisthat?\"
\"Beautythatseemedbeautiful.\"
\"That\'sacomplimenttous,\"remarkedMrs.Mayhew,acidly.
\"Imeanthekindofbeautywhichdoesonegoodandmakesamanwishthathewereaman.\"
\"Doyoumeananunmarriedman?\"saidhiswifewithadiscordantlaugh.
\"Probablyyourownwishessuggestedthatspeech,madam,\"repliedthehusband,bitterly.
\"Andpray,wheredidyoufindsomuchbeauty?\"saidMrs.Mayhew,ignoringhislastremark.
\"Onabreezyhill-side.It\'sakindofbeauty,too,thatonecanenjoywithoutpayingnumberlessbillsforitsenhancement.Irefertothatofthescenery.\"
\"Oh,\"remarkedMrs.Mayhew,indifferently;\"itwouldhavebeenmoretoyourcreditifyouhadgonetochurchinsteadoftrampingaroundthefields.\"
\"Ithinkthefieldshavedonemoreformethanchurchforyou.\"
\"Whyso?\"wasthesharpresponse.
\"Theyhaveatleastkeptmefromindulginginonebadhabit.Iamsober.\"
\"Theydonotkeepyoufrommakingill-naturedremarks,\"saidMrs.
Mayhew,sailingoutoftheroomfullybedizenedforthesolemnityofdinner.
\"Yousayyouwere\'shown\'allthisbeauty,\"remarkedIda,whowasgivingthefinishingtouchestohertoiletbeforealargemirror,andbywhomthefrequentbickeringsofherparentswerescarcelynoted.\"Whoofficiatedasshowman?\"
\"Amanwhounderstandsthebeautiesofalandscapesowellthathecouldmakethemvisibleeventomydimeyes,andattractivetomydeadenedandbesottednature.I\'dgivealltheworldifIcouldbeyoung,strong,andhopefullikehim,again.Itwasgoodofhim——yes,goodofhim,totrytocheerastrangerwithpleasantthoughtsandsights.IsupposeyouareacquaintedwithMr.VanBerg,sinceheisafriendofIk\'s?\"
\"No,I\'mnot,\"wasthesharpreply;\"nordoIwishtobe.\"
\"Whynot?\"askedMr.Mayhewinsomesurprise.
\"It\'ssufficientthatIdon\'tlikehim.\"
\"He\'snotyourstyle,Isupposeyoumeantosay?\"
\"Indeedheisnot.\"
\"Somuchworseforyourstyle,Ida.\"
Shewassweepingpetulantlyfromtheroomwhenherfatheraddedwithadepthoffeelingveryunlikehiswontedapathy:\"O,Ida,itwerebetterthatallthreeofushadneverbeenbornthantoliveaswedo!Yourlifeandyourmother\'sisfroth,andmineismud.
HowIhateditallthisbrightJunemorning,asMr.VanBerggavemeaglimpseintoanotherandbetterworld!\"
\"DoyoumeantosaythatMr.VanBergpresumedtocriticisemymodeoflife?\"Idaaskedwithadarkeningface.
\"Oh,no,no!Howsmallandegotisticalallyourideasare!Henevermentionedyou,andprobablyneverthoughtofyou.Heonlytookalittlepainsthatatiredanddispiritedmanmightseeandfeeltheeternalbeautyandfreshnessofnature,asonemightgive,inpassing,acupofwatertoatraveller.\"
\"Idon\'tseewhatreasonyouhaveforfeelingandappearingsoforlornly,thusaskingforsympathyfromstrangers,asitwere,andcausingittoseemasifweweremakingamartyrofyou.Asforthisartist,withhissuperiorairs,Idetesthim.Heneverlosesachancetoannoyandmortifyme.I\'venodoubthehopedyouwouldcomehomeandtellus,asyouhave,howmuchbetterhewasthan——\"
\"There,there,quitthatkindoftalkorI\'llbedrunkinhalfanhour.\"saidherfather,harshly.\"Ifyouhadtheheartofawoman,letalonethatofadaughter,youwouldthankthemanwhohadunwittinglykeptmefrommakingabeastofmyselfforonedayatleast.Godowntoyourdinner,I\'minnomoodforeating.\"
Shewentwithoutaword,butwithamoreseverecompunctionofconsciencethanshehadeverfeltbeforeinherlife.Herfather\'sfaceandwordssmoteherwithakeenreproach,piercingthethickarmorofhervanityandselfishness.Shesaw,foramoment,howunnaturalandunlovelyshemustappeartohim,inspiteofherbeauty,andthethoughtcrossedhermind:
\"Mr.VanBergdespisesmebecauseheseesmeinthesamelight.
HowIhatehiscold,criticaleyes!\"
EvenathisfarremoveVanBergcouldseethatshewasillateaseduringthedinnerhour.Therewouldbetimesofforcedandunnaturalgayety,followedbyasuddenclouduponthebrowandanabstractedair,asifherthoughtshadnaughttodowiththechatteringgrouparoundher.Itwouldalsoappearthatherappetitewasflaggingunusually,andonceortwicehethoughtshedartedanangrylooktowardshim.
Asifsomethingwereburdeninghermind,sheatlastleftthetablehastily,beforetheotherswerethroughwiththeirdessert.
Asmaybesurmised,shesoughtherfather\'sroom.Receivingnoresponsetoherknock,sheenteredandsawataglancetheconfirmationofherfears.Herfathersatinanarm-chairwithhisheaduponhisbreast.Abrandybottlestoodonthetablebesidehim.Atthesoundofherstephelookedupforamomentwithheavyeyes,andmumbled:
\"Heain\'tofyourstyle,ishe?Norofmine,either.Frothandmud!\"
Idagaveasuddenstampofrageanddisgust,andwhirledfromtheroom.
VanBerghappenedtoseeherasshedescendedtothemainhall-way,andherfacewassorepulsiveastosuggesttohimthelinesfromShakespeare:
\"Innaturethere\'snoblemish,butthemind;
Nonecanbecalleddeformed,buttheunkind;
Virtueisbeauty;butthebeauteous——evilAreemptytrunks,o\'erflourishedbythedevil.\"
Thatafternoonandeveningherrecklesslevityandopencoquetrysecuredunfavorablecommentnotonlyfromtheartist,butfromothersfarmoreindifferent,whoseattentionshehalfcompelledbyamannerthatdidnotsuggestspringviolets.
VanBergwasdisgusted.Hewaslessversedinhumannaturethanart,anddidnotrecognizeintheforcedandobtrusivegayetytheefforttostiflethevoiceofanarousedconscience.Eventoherbluntedsenseofrightitseemedahatefulanddisgracefultruththatastrangerhadhelpedherfathertowardsmanhood,anthatshehaddestroyedthetransientandsalutaryinfluence.HercomplacencyhadbeendisturbedfromthetimehercousinhadrepeatedVanBerg\'sremark,\"IcouldnotspeakcivillytoaladythatIhadjustseengigglingandflirtingthroughoneofBeethoven\'sfinestsymphonies;\"
andnow,throughanunexpectedchainofcircumstances,shehad,forthefirsttimeinherlife,reachedapointofself-disgustandself-loathing.Suchamoralconditionisevil\'sopportunitywhenadispositiontowardspenitenceorreformiseitherabsentorresisted.Thethought,therefore,ofherfather\'sdrunkennessthatday,andofherselfastheimmediatecause,madehersowretchedandrecklessthatshetriedtoforgethermiserableselfinexcitement,ashehadinlethargy.Evenhermotherchidedher,askingifshedidnot\"remembertheday.\"
\"Indeed,Ishallhaveoccasiontorememberit,\"washerambiguousanswer;\"butMondaysinthecountryarealwaysblue,andI\'lldomyrepentingthen.IfIwereagoodCatholicI\'dhuntupapriestto-morrow.\"
\"I\'llbeyourfather-confessorto-day,\"saidablack-eyedyoungman,twirlinghismustache.
\"You,Mr.Sibely?Youwouldleadmeintomorenaughtinessthanyouwouldhelpmeoutof,twiceover.FormyconfessorIwouldchooseanancientmanwhohadhadhisdinner.Whatacomfortablebeliefitis,tobesure!Allonehastodoistobuzzone\'ssinsthroughagratingthatislikeanindefinitenumberofkey-holestoadozingoldgentlemaninside,andthenawaywithaheartlikeafeather,toloadupagain.I\'dblessthemanwhocouldconvertmetoaPapist.\"
Butshehatedthemanwhohadmadeherfeeltheneedofabsolution,andwhoseemedaninseparablepartofallherdisagreeableexperiences.
Althoughheappearedtoavoidanylocalityinwhichsheremained,sheobservedhiseyesturnedtowardshermorethanoncebeforethedayclosed,anditexasperatedheralmostbeyondallendurancetobelievethattheirexpressionwasonlythatofcontempt.
Shemighthavebeenalittlebetterpleased,perhaps,ifshehadknownthatshemadetheartistalmostasuncomfortableasherself.
Neverbeforehadthereseemedtohimsogreatacontrastbetweenherbeautyandherself,herfeaturesandherface.Thelattercouldnotfailtoexcitehisincreaseddisgust,whiletheformerwassogreatthathefoundhimselfbecomingresolutelybentonredeemingthemfromwhatseemedahorridprofanation.Inaccordancewithoneofhischaracteristics,themoredifficulttheprojectseemed,themoreobstinatelyfixedbecamehispurposetodiscoverwhethershehadamindofsufficientcalibretotransformherintowhatshemightbe,incontrastwithwhatshewas.Themorehesawofherthemorehisinterestasanartist,and,indirectly,asastudentofcharacter,wasdeepened.Ifshehadnomindworthnaminghewouldgivetheproblemuptothesolutionoftime,which,however,promisednothingbutagradualfadingawayofallbeauty,andtheintensifyingofinwarddeformityuntilfullyreproducedinoutwardugliness.
ChapterVII.AnotherFeminineProblem.
EarlyonMondaymorning,Mr.Mayhewhastenedfromthebreakfast-tabletothestage.Hiswifeanddaughterwerenotdowntoseehimoff,andheseemeddesirousofshunningallrecognition.Withtheexceptionthatthathiseyeswereheavyandbloodshotfromhisdebauch,hisfacehadthesamedreary,apatheticexpressionwhichVanBerghadnotedonhisarrival.Andsohewentbacktohiscityoffice,where,fortunatelyforhim,mechanicalroutinebroughtgoldenrewards,sincehewasinnostateforbusinessenterprise.
Fromhisappearance,VanBergcouldnothelpsurmisingwhathadbeenhisconditionthepreviousday.IndeedStanton,withacontemptuousshrug,hadthesameassaidonSabbathevening,thathisunclehad\"droppedintotheoldslough.\"AlthoughneitheroftheyoungmenknewhowgreatanimpetusIdahadgivenherfathertowardssuchdegradation,theybothfeltthatifhiswifeanddaughterhadhadthetacttodetectandappreciatehisbettermood,producedbythemorningramble,theymighthavesustainedhim,andgivenhimatleastonedaythathecouldrememberwithoutshameanddiscouragement.
VanBergfoundsomethingpatheticinMr.Mayhew\'swearyanddisheartenedmanner.Itwaslikethatofasoldierwhohassuffereddefeat,butwhogoesonwithhisroutineinamechanical,spiritlessmanner,becausethereisnothingelsetodo.Heseemedtohavenohope,norevenathoughtofretrievingthepastandofreassertinghisownmanhood.Accustomedastheyoungartisthadeverbeentoahouseholdinwhichaffection,alliedtohigh-bredcourtesyandmutualrespect,madeevenhomelydailylifenobleandbeautiful,hecouldnotlookonthediscordantMayhewfamilywiththecharity,ortheindifference,ofthosewhohaveseenmoreofthewrongsideoflife.Hadtherebeenonlypoor,besmirchedMr.Mayhew,andstout,dressy,volubleMrs.Mayhew,hewouldneverhaveglancedtowardsthemthesecondtime;buthisartist\'seyeshadfallenonthecontradictorybeingthatlinkedthemtogether.Morallyandmentallysheseemedonewithherparentstock;butherbeauty,insomeofitsaspects,wassomarvellous,thatthedesiretoredeemitfromitshatefulandgrotesqueassociationsgrewstrongereveryhour.
Instead,therefore,ofgoingoffuponsolitaryrambles,ashehaddonehitherto,hemingledmorefrequentlyintheamusementsoftheguestsofthehouse,withthehopehewouldthusbebroughtsooftenincontactwiththesubjectofhisexperiment,thatherpiquewouldwearawaysufficientlytopermitthemtomeetonsomethinglikefriendlyterms.
Asfarastheotherguestswereconcerned,hehadnottrouble.
Theywelcomedhimtocroquet,towalkingandboatingexcursions,andtotheireveninggamesandpromenades.Suchoftheladiesasdancedwerepleasedtosecurehimasapartner.Indeed,fromthedearthofgentlemenduringtheweek,hesoonfoundhimselfmoreindemandthanhecaredtobe,andsawthateventhelandlordwasbeginningtorelyuponhimtokeepupastateofpleasurableeffervescenceamonghispatrons.Hislanguidfriend,Stanton,wasnotalittlesurprised,andatlastremarked:
\"Why,Van,whathascomeoveryou?Ineversawyouintheroleofasocietyfellowbefore!\"
Buthisunwontedcourtesiesseemedwhollyinvain.Hepropitiatedandwonallsaveone,andthatonewasthesoleobjectofhiseffort.
Whileallotherssmiled,herfaceremainedcoldandaverted.Indeedshetooksuchpainstoignoreandavoidhim,thatitwasgenerallyrecognizedthattherewasadifferencebetweenthem,andofcoursetherewasanendlessamountofgossipingsurmise.Asthehostilityseemedwhollyonthelady\'sside,VanBergappearedtothebetteradvantage,andIdawasallthemoreprovokedassherecognizedthefact.
Shenowbegantowishthatshehadtakenadifferentcourse.AsVanBergpursuedhispresenttactics,herfeminineintuitionwasnotsodullbutthatshewasledtobelievehewishedtomakeheracquaintance.Ofcoursetherewas,tohermind,butoneexplanationofthisfact——hewasbecomingfascinated,likesomanyothers.
\"IfIwereonlyonspeakingandflirtingterms,\"shethoughtthetworelationswereaboutsynonymousinherestimation,\"Imightdrawhimontoapointwhichwouldgivemeachanceofpunishinghimfarmorethanisnowpossiblebysullenlykeepingaloof.Asitis,itlookstothesepeoplehereasifhehadjiltedmeinsteadofIhim,andthatIamsulkingoverit.\"
Butshehadentangledherselfinthesnarlofherownpreviouswordsandmanner.Shehadchargedhermotherandcousintopermitnooverturesofpeace;andonceortwice,whenminehost,inhisgood-natured,off-handmanner,hadsoughttointroducethem,shehadbeensoblindanddeaftohispurposeastoappearpositivelyrude.Herrepugnancetotheartisthadbecomeagenerallyrecognizedfact;andshehadbuiltupsuchabarrierthatshecouldnotbreakitdownwithoutaskingformorehelpthanwasagreeabletoherpride.Butshechafedinwardlyatherfalseposition,andattheincreasingpopularityoftheobjectofherspite.
Evenhermotheratlastformedhisacquaintance;and,astheartistlistenedtothegarrulousladyforhalfanhourwithscarcelyaninterruption,shepronouncedhimoneofthemostentertainingofmen.
AsMrs.Mayhewwaschantinghispraisesthatevening,Idabrokeoutpetulantly:
\"Wasthereeversuchagad-flyasthisartist!Hepestersmefrommorningtillnight.\"
\"Pestersyou!Ineversawaladysoseverelyletaloneasyouarebyhim.Whateveristhecauseofyourspiteitseemstoharmonlyyourself,andIshouldjudgefromyourremarkthatitdisturbsyoumuchmorethanyouwouldhaveitappear——certainlyfarmorethanitdoeshim.\"
Therewasnosoothingbalminthesewords,asmaywellbesupposed;
andyettheimpressiongrewuponIdathattheartistwouldbefriendlyifhecould;andthebeliefstrengthenedwithhimalsothatshetookfartoomuchpainstomanifestwhatshewouldhaveothersthinktobemereindifferenceanddislike,andheinterceptedbesides,withincreasingfrequency,furtiveglancestowardshimself.
Somuchicehadaccumulatedbetweenthem,howeverthatneitherknewhowitwastobebroken.
Oneday,aboutthemiddleoftheweek,VanBergfoundastrangerseatedoppositetohimatthedinnertable.Hisfirstimpressionwas,thattheladywasnotveryyoungandthatherfeatureswerequiteplain;butbeforethemealwasoverheconcludedthatherfacewasdecidedlyinteresting,andthatthesuggestionofagehadbeenmadebymaturityofcharacterandtheimpresswhichsomerealanddeepexperiencegivestothecountenance,ratherthanbythetraceofyears.
Whileyetastranger,theexpressionofherblueeyes,assheglancedaround,wassokindlythatsheatoncewonthegood-willofallwhoencounteredthem.Thisgenial,friendlylightinhereyesseemedamarkedcharacteristic.Itwassodifferentfromtheobtrusive,forwardmannerwithwhichsomeseektomakeacquaintances,thatitwouldnothavesuggestedadeparturefrommodestreserve,eventothemostcynical.Itratherindicatedaheartaglowwithgentlefeelingandgenialgood-will,likeamaple-woodfireonahospitalityhearth,thatwarmsallwhocomewithinthesphereofitsinfluence.
VanBergwasnaturallyreserved,andslowtomakenewacquaintances.
Butbeforehehadstolenmanyglancesofthefaceoppositehimhebegantowishfortheprivilegeofspeakingtoher——awishthatwasincreasedbythefactthattheywerealoneatthetable,theotherguestswhousuallyoccupiedthechairsnothavingreturnedfromtheirmorningdrive.shedidnotlookathiminparticular,norappeartobeintheleaststruckbyhis\"distingue\"air,asIdahadbeenbeforeshewasblindedbyprejudice;butshelookedoutupontheworldatlargewithsuchafriendlyaspectthathewassureshehadsomethingpleasanttosay.Hewasthereforewellpleasedwhenatlastthelandlordbustledupinhisbrusquewayandsaid: