Wragbywasthere,theservants……butspectral,notreallyexisting。Conniewentforwalksinthepark,andinthewoodsthatjoinedthepark,andenjoyedthesolitudeandthemystery,kickingthebrownleavesofautumn,andpickingtheprimrosesofspring。Butitwasalladream;orratheritwaslikethesimulacrumofreality。Theoak-leavesweretoherlikeoak-leavesseenrufflinginamirror,sheherselfwasafiguresomebodyhadreadabout,pickingprimrosesthatwereonlyshadowsormemories,orwords。Nosubstancetoheroranything……notouch,nocontact!OnlythislifewithClifford,thisendlessspinningofwebsofyarn,oftheminutiaeofconsciousness,thesestoriesSirMalcolmsaidtherewasnothingin,andtheywouldn’tlast。Whyshouldtherebeanythinginthem,whyshouldtheylast?Sufficientuntothedayistheevilthereof。Sufficientuntothemomentistheappearanceofreality。
Cliffordhadquiteanumberoffriends,acquaintancesreally,andheinvitedthemtoWragby。Heinvitedallsortsofpeople,criticsandwriters,peoplewhowouldhelptopraisehisbooks。AndtheywereflatteredatbeingaskedtoWragby,andtheypraised。Connieunderstooditallperfectly。
Butwhynot?Thiswasoneofthefleetingpatternsinthemirror。Whatwaswrongwithit?
Shewashostesstothesepeople……mostlymen。ShewashostessalsotoClifford’soccasionalaristocraticrelations。Beingasoft,ruddy,country-lookinggirl,inclinedtofreckles,withbigblueeyes,andcurling,brownhair,andasoftvoice,andratherstrong,femaleloinsshewasconsideredalittleold-fashionedand`womanly’。Shewasnota`littlepilchardsortoffish’,likeaboy,withaboy’sflatbreastandlittlebuttocks。Shewastoofemininetobequitesmart。
Sothemen,especiallythosenolongeryoung,wereverynicetoherindeed。But,knowingwhattorturepoorCliffordwouldfeelattheslightestsignofflirtingonherpart,shegavethemnoencouragementatall。Shewasquietandvague,shehadnocontactwiththemandintendedtohavenone。Cliffordwasextraordinarilyproudofhimself。